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Spoofwriter who hadn't read the previous posts and didn't know that it was Penguin alone who had gone to the convent so.......

He sat at the table, and beat himself over the knuckles with a meat tenderiser. The kitchen door opened with a bang! It was the Penguin! "Hows it cookin sweety?" he asked Armfeetandtoe. "I haven't started on the potatoes yet!" came the reply. Penguin pick up a saucepan and......

said, "Sorry Arm. Gotta go back to the convent to continue my undercover assignment. I just popped back for a pan to cook the brussel sprouts in. Tara me old mucker and don't forget to......


LG

...The phrase was cut short, as a sudden scene change left Penguin in the middle of a desert. "Damn," he said. "I really need to get some anti-scene-change cream." Just then the scene changed again and...

"Use some garlic on those knuckles, remember, EVERYTHING is better with garlic, Whaa! Whaa! Whaa! Whaaaa!" said The Penguin as he went on his way to the convent.

Meanwhile at Batman's house(alias Caboose Wayne) Robin the King of Wankers was laying down tape to divide the house.

"That's my side of the kitchen, I don't want to see your ruddy bat guano anywhere's near my side of the house, got it Bat brain?" said Robin.

"Robin old chum," said Batman, "I'm not sure what to say, I'm truly sorry about our misunderstanding."

"Can it rat shit! I'm never talking to you again," declared Robin.

"Does that count?" asked Batman.

"After that," said Robin.

"You mean after that." said Batman.

"No I mean now, after this," retorted Robin.

"You're still talking to me," said Batman.

"I mean now!!!" yelled Robin.......

"Holy cow Batman. We are supposed to be doing a scene change right now"

WHIZ! CABAM! CRASH! ZOOM!

The scene change happened with everyone from this strange saga finding themselves in a scene from 'The Wizard of Oz'.

Dorothy was astounded at the appearance of new characters in her story, whom she had never seen or heard of before and said..............

"Oy,you! The mobile scap metal merchant, if we dont find some money to pay for the grub, you are history!"
With that, the Tin man struck a Maddona pose and said.......




Arm xxxxx

"I'm a virgin.....for the very last time," and the Cowardly Lion managed to squeak out......


LG

"Dont cry for me Marg and Tina!" To two fat ladies standing in a bucket of custard by the side of the road.
On closer inspection, the two fat ladies were in fact......





Arm xxxx

the Two Hairy Bikers who had been pinned down and forced to remove their beards. When they stood up and looked at each other, the fattest one yelled.....

"ZZ!" yelled the fattest.
"Top!" Yelled the slightly less fat one.

"You know I've always liked men who dress well," said Dorothy
"You mean sharp dressed men?" asked the fattest.
"Yes well I guess so,"said Dororthy
"There's something about a sharp dressed man," said Robin flipping his cape and combing his hair.
"Aint it the truth! Aint it the truth!" said the Lion licking his crotch and....

just to clarify, the Lion was licking his own crotch and not Robin's. Dorothy called the Scarecrow over and Robin was heard to mutter.......

..."Next thing you know, we'll scene-change into the year 2030. What are the chances of that happening?" Those are part of the list of phrases that you must never say...

"Shut up!" said Robin. "Stop manipulating me!" Just then a giant gag appeared on Robin's mouth as the scene changed. But, a horror was to befall Batman and Robin. It...

Was Pop it in Pete, the terrorist Gay Postman! "Look at the muck on here!" He cried. As he wiped his hand along the Batmobile. "I've got me portal open, saucy, so you can go to any era you like". With that, Batman and dorothy......

...wanted to go back in time to kill Hitler.

"Can't go there," said the portal guy. "Time-locked. Change that and the universe will kerplode. DON'T."

"How about 2015?"

"Nope. UK general elections. Mess something up there... and well..."

"2026?"

"Yeah, okay. Go through."

They landed in 2026 New York, where the city was being run by Apple-Starbucks....

"Narrator. No product placement. I don't want to get screwed!" Forget you tiny idiot. Anyway, yeah. It's pretty damn wierd. Also in New York 2026...

the people were lined up for a booksigning. President Justin Beiber (yes he became an American Citizen and eventually 'President') was signing his new book, "The Almost True Story of the Singing Foetus" when Batman and Robin arrived in the Batmobile with an assortment of characters for various movies.

Justin spotted them and yelled.....

..."They're the smartest people on the planet!" You see, due to survival of the best (with the best now the guys with the most kids - and they're damn stupid), human IQ has fallen to nearly 50. So, one character, called Average Joe, was now the smartest man on the planet. It was long before our rag-tag band of stolen characters that are not in the public domain were asked to solve...

the problem 'what is two plus two'. No one in the crowd had a clue so Batman told them it was '5' and coz they were all thick as two short planks...they believed it then asked Batman to solve the problem of their .....

... crop shortages. They were watered using Gatorade, as they said that plants crave electrolytes. However, Average Joe rememebered from school science that electrolytes were salts. Plants don't like salts. However, they were laughed at for talking 'faggy' as talking smart was considered negative. Our group of unlicenced heroes then...

... crop shortages. They were watered using Gatorade, as they said that plants crave electrolytes. However, Average Joe rememebered from school science that electrolytes were salts. Plants don't like salts. However, they were laughed at for talking 'faggy' as talking smart was considered negative. Our group of unlicenced heroes then...

read that bit of the story TWICE for 'so it was posted' and gave the 'faggy' talkers a damned good ticking off for not believing Joe Average. They hung their heads in shame and their leader 'John The Village Idiot Majors" said to Batman and Co......

"Only fags talk like that." Luckily, the portal accidentally opened and only Average Joe was transported back home. Sadly, he landed in the back of a van full of evil-looking...

...Spoof Writers who had gathered together for their monthly meeting about which 'newbie' to verbally attack next.

Joe Average smiled at them and asked.....

(JUST JOKING GUYS...FOR THE STORY YOU KNOW! HONEST MARK...NOT WISHING TO START OWT...IT JUST POPPED INTO MY HEAD)

"So who is this Mark Dweeb anyhow?" Joe exploded into a small pile of smoldering ashes.

"Holy Spoof Poop Batman? Did you see that?" asked Robin.
"Sorry Robin, I'm a bit busy stutking this delightful Smurf Creature."

"Isn't her hiney a little big for your liking?" asked the Tin Man....

Well yes, but she's a bleeding cartoon character....back to the plot. Batman, Robin and the others decided to ....