Discussion Forum

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Quote: Fergus McCarthy

They'll get their comeuppance when they are caught Monkey, the full weight of British justice will be unleashed on the spineless cunts.

ASBO'S and a ban on wearing hoodies.


Bet they're shitting it.

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I occasionally dress up as a monk. I hope this is not some veiled reference to me. I also wear a leather jacket, beatle boots, brothel creepers, a sex pistols t-shirt and blue jeans. Cos I'm a rebel without any fashion sense.

Kill the motherfuckers as painfully as possible.

assumptions, assumptions. I am not making light of the blight that is British society or making fun of an old ladies grief over her pet. The assumptions I am referring to are yours, that she is defenceless, that she has no family to look after her, that she's alone with her budgie, that she was faced with a heartrending choice. The British media doesn't exactly have "accurate and impartial" stamped all over it, let's face it, some Spoofs on here are probably more factually accurate than some press reports.
What sounds better; A/ "sweet little old lady has pets neck snapped by callous twats" or B/" Rich middle class fox-huntress refuses to hand over family silver, stubbornly refuses as robbers kill pet"
I'm not suggesting that this story is not heartrending, I'm just saying that we are basing our revulsion on the accuracy of one journo trying to earn a crust.

Ferg; good idea about the eagle; that'll surprise 'em when they come back 2 weeks after they calculate that she's got the insurance money and bought everything again.

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Quote: carina-eta

ok, at the risk of being lambasted here...
you eat chicken,



Have a heart Carina.

Maybe they didn't want to do 'bird' and saw the budgie as a stool pigeon...you know, when they are down the nick and the cops say 'a little birdy told us it was you what robbed that granny'

I think they had no choice - rather than go before the beak with a witness, an eye witness, they took him out. Those things sing like canaries.

It is cowardly and deserve a white feather however I bet they'll wing it when they should be caged and hung from the ceiling with noting but cuttle fish to eat.

That's my take on it anyway

Morning Dunc.


All well?

Well let's say it wasn't a budgie but Jesus Budda was over visiting, not so much as a pet but as an aquaintance, having a nice cup of tea and minding his own business as it were.

What if the old lady held out with her money and the robbers threatened to snap Jesus's neck like a pencil and lay into him with the boots, Clockwork Orange like, ultraviolent, leaving him gasping on the floor, teacup in hand, beyond recognition.

I'm just saying what if? Should she keep the money or not?

They could be bluffing you know or would they make the mistake of unleashing his violent rage against them like some giant freekin budgie gone mental.

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Quote: victor nicholas

Well let's say it wasn't a budgie but Jesus Budda was over visiting, not so much as a pet but as an aquaintance, having a nice cup of tea and minding his own business as it were.

What if the old lady held out with her money and the robbers threatened to snap Jesus's neck like a pencil and lay into him with the boots, Clockwork Orange like, ultraviolent, leaving him gasping on the floor, teacup in hand, beyond recognition.

I'm just saying what if? Should she keep the money or not?

They could be bluffing you know or would they make the mistake of unleashing his violent rage against them like some giant freekin budgie gone mental.

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The man has a point.

Maybe it's just me.

But if I go to an aquarium or a farmyard, or whatever, I just see dinner. It's food.

By the way, I'm not fat.

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Quote: Skoob1999

But if I go to an aquarium or a farmyard, or whatever, I just see dinner. It's food.

By the way, I'm not fat.

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What about if you go to the zoo?

When you look in the panda cage do you see a cuddly looking but possibly dangerous bear eating bamboo?

Or do you see an appetizing entree, sorta like Wile E. Cyote sees the Roadrunner and he imagines him roasted like a chicken- with paper doiles on the legs?

So which is it?

Oh yeah, I'm sure you aren't fat- everything around you shrunk, that's all

So if you go to the gym or the pool, do you see dessert?

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Quote: Fergus McCarthy

Morning Dunc.


All well?

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All is well here - meet you at 7 down the pub?

It's a date.

Ahhhhhhhh...They probably iced the budgy because she didn't have a little pussy!

Shit, thanks Buck. I nearly forgot.


Duncan
I'll bring the budgies and the icing.

You get the cats........And new velcro.

I don;t know...has anyone considered that these guys so able to do a thing like this may very well have done it ANYWAY, after getting the money, just for kicks?

When I go to the zoo and look at the elephants, the rhino's, and the hippo's I see steak.

I'm not fat by the way.

What this has to do with the thread is unclear.

Like my poor addled brain.

Happy spoofing all.

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Quote: linda warnke

I don;t know...has anyone considered that these guys so able to do a thing like this may very well have done it ANYWAY, after getting the money, just for kicks?

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Good point, Linda Wanker.

This is what I was getting at. It doesn't matter what the lady should or should not have done. More to the point is why our society now produces droves of these dickheads who think along these lines.

She was probably, as Carina said, some old rich bird, or doddery basket case, but who cares? I don't think those two fuckwits had been doing research on her before the event.

I'm still angry.

I'm all in favour of a Special Unit that would deal with this sort of thing. I mean, a group that would 'sort' these things out - in private, like.

Know what I mean?

Would you have been as outraged if they'd snapped her neck?

Of course I would. More so.

Your question seems to imply that you feel I may not. This isn't the case, but what I wanted to say, was that I'm fed up of hearing about cases such as this, where someone has pulled a stunt that is somehow warped, evil, pathetic even.

We see it all too often these days.


To recap:

Budgie neck snapped - outrageous
Old woman's neck snapped - outrageous
Old woman's house broken into by a couple of fuckwits searching desperately for whatever they can lay their filthy, thieving hands on to feed their pathetic drug habits, and frightening the life out of the old dear - outrageous

I would too, but it's hit-and-miss as to whether the media would have picked up on the story. She'd be just another crime victim.

True enough.

Sorry for the accusatory tone in my initial message, I wasn't intending to be provocative towards you personally.

I know that!