Discussion Forum

I thought this should be done (considering we all write 'fiction'). The rule is that you write 1 to 3 sentences, and end with '...' so the person after you can finish off.

E.g. PERSON A
I went shopping at the store when....
PERSON B
... Dr. Evulz stole the last box of Shredded Wheat. NOO! I hate him. Then, I went to the checkout...

(p.s. these are the parameters:
- The protagonist (or hero) is a guy, we can add a woman in later
- it can take place anywhere. Anywhere.
- Keep it logical-ish. In fact, just make some form of sense.
- No-one write, this is the end. Only I can do that. Me.)

So here goes.

There I was, walking down the street. Everything was fine.
But as I turned the corner I saw...

that Inhopeless had started a thread that we'd had before. The thread had once been quite loved, especially by me, but was prematurely terminated. I felt so uplifted at the thoughts of, once again, prattling on about nothing that I.....


LG

...added a reply, signalling that I acknowledged Lady Godiva's post. However, back in story-land, approaching our hero was a giant...

ant, with menacing eyes. He looked straight into my eyes and reached out with one of his gigantic limbs and he.....

hoisted me on his back side-saddle upon a purple silk cushion with a gold embroidered monogram LG in palace script

worked in golden embroidery slik and once seated....

...was treated to a show. Well, by show, I mean a giant tirade of its brothers and sisters wrecking up my hometown. But then out of the blue...

came two Spoof Writers carrying laptops and cameras. They proceeded to type furiously, one stopping now and again to take photographs. When asked what they were doing, the ugliest one said.....

..."Making some money on the side. We're real journos outside of the Spoof. Name's Inhopeless. How else do you think we're so good?" But then, suddenly...

A huge hand reached out and grabbed Inhopless by the grongles and shook him violently. "Where is the keeper of the Spoof!" Roared the voice. Inhopeless looked up to see.....







Arm xxxxx

his pants fell down revealing the origin of his nom de plume and everybody'...'

gasped, because they thought the spoofer was inchcock but it wasn't. To the surprise of all bystanders it turned out to be....


LG

The missing Lord Lucan! Hooray! shouted the crowd, "Nab the bastard!" Shouted the police. In the melee, Lucan made a dash for it. Outside, Lady G was waiting in her..........






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Lady G-mobile and beckoned for Lord Lucas to enter her vehicle. Quite taken by the beauty of this strange, alluring lady, he succomed to her womanly wiles, entered her G-mobile and laid his head on her lap whispering......

"Please dont be a lady boy". The fugatives made thier way to the home Self raising Stan, a well know baker and Hedgehog comber. Stan told them.................







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..."Lemme guess. You want to move away from the giant ant crashing down the street. I'm Luke, as Stan is 200km away being forced...

into a fruit bottle by a Peruvian nun dressed in calico and rubber while the Salvation Army plays the Greatest Hits of Nana Mouskouri and the arrival of...

Long Wayne Twitty and his band of Texan Titties.
The band played through the night, and into the house next door, on and on they played until every finger was sore.
Not being a party pooper.......................





Arm xxx

the Vicar took his clothes off, and, pausing only to grab Mrs Nunwick's ukelele, shinned up the drainpipe and onto the roof. "Reverend Bellweather!" called the Bishop (who was enjoying a plate of warm blancmange) "don't be ridiculous! You know you can't play the ukulele. Please..." He was stopped in mid-sentence by a great...

Chorus from the crowd. "Jump, you fucker jump!, into this ere blanket we are holdin, an you will be alright!"
The vicar jumped. "Hahahahaha!" laughed the crowd. "There was no blanket below!". They chanted, the Bishop........








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ran over to the body on the ground, but before he reached it he tripped over his frock landing face down in a pile of horse manure which had just been dropped by a passing horse.

The Bishop slowly arose, looked at the giggling crowd and said, in a very bishopy voice.....

LG

"..come down slowly. Bollocks, too late!" yelled the Bishop, and turned back to his blancmange, desisting only when distracted by the vision of loveliness now stood standing before him. "Oi, there's a queue, Mrs" shouted the Bishop, spitting vanilla blancmange all over a stationery penguin that was selling envelopes nearby. "What are you gonna do about it, you fat nonce?", quoth Engelbert Humperdinck (for it was he). "Gerry? Is that Gerry Dorsey?" came a high-pitched voice from an upstairs window. "Have you seen...?"

That's buggered that then!

...the brand new series of This Show? Remember, always drink Coca-Cola, and drive the Ford Focus. What? They pay me to say this stuff." Meanwhile, in an offshore port...

Griptight fin paced the room. "Mien new play, MEN-IN-GITIS, vill be zer hit all over zer vorld! No more vill hey haff to shuvel ein shit in zer farm, ven zey hear der funniest yoke in zer veld! dumkof! zey vill die! Ahahaahaahahah! but virst ey must......







Arm xxxx