Discussion Forum

Hello mates.

I had things to do today, so on the way home, the Mrs and I stopped off at a lovely country hostelry.

We sat in the garden in the sun. (Not often you can say that here.)

Anyway, to cut a long story short, two care workers arrived with two patients. I was a care worker myself for a year, so I could empathise with the carers, both of whom were really quite professional.

The funny thing was, that one of the patients got a little impatient waiting for his dinner to be served.

So he started shouting "SAUSAGE!" at the top of his voice. Repeatedly: "SAUSAGE!"

It was interesting to note people's reactions. Pointed disinterest for the most part, but feigned disinterest. A kind of unease.

Some people have real problems accepting that others can be damaged. I think it's a bit sad. It can be daunting working with people who exhibit challenging behaviour, but it can also be very rewarding.

As the party left, I felt like standing up and applauding the carers, who did an excellent job.

The man calmed down when his sausages were served.

Maybe a Martin Shuttlecock story in this.

We'll see.

Regards

Skoob.

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Quote: Skoob1999

Hello mates.

I had things to do today, so on the way home, the Mrs and I stopped off at a lovely country hostelry.

We sat in the garden in the sun. (Not often you can say that here.)

Anyway, to cut a long story short, two care workers arrived with two patients. I was a care worker myself for a year, so I could empathise with the carers, both of whom were really quite professional.

The funny thing was, that one of the patients got a little impatient waiting for his dinner to be served.

So he started shouting "SAUSAGE!" at the top of his voice. Repeatedly: "SAUSAGE!"

It was interesting to note people's reactions. Pointed disinterest for the most part, but feigned disinterest. A kind of unease.

Some people have real problems accepting that others can be damaged. I think it's a bit sad. It can be daunting working with people who exhibit challenging behaviour, but it can also be very rewarding.

As the party left, I felt like standing up and applauding the carers, who did an excellent job.

The man calmed down when his sausages were served.

Maybe a Martin Shuttlecock story in this.

We'll see.

Regards

Skoob.

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Missed opportunity, Skoob. I think the caretakers would have at least liked to hear from you how you admired their skill. Sometimes a kind word makes all the difference. Unless they read these forums, how will they know someone said something nice about them?

Skoob also knows about challenging behaviour - if only he'd given me some tips before he got pissed he'd never have got into trouble on our day out.


Me too, I have first-hand experience of challenging behaviour.

Why is it though that if kids start displaying challenging behaviour when out with parents say, at the supermarket, the looks aren't of pointed disinterest. They are more accusational, disapproving and designed to make the unfortunate parent feel guilty and somehow inadequate.

Skoob, a year ago, my dad had an operation, and the hospital messed up the aftercare, resulting in my dad having severe brain damage and paralasis.

He was a quiet gentleman, very patient and long suffering.

He now screams and shouts, demands everything and shows disrespect to all and sundry.
The Nursing home have asked me to take my dad out for the day, I can't.

I was a gangster for most of my life, violence was second nature to me. I reformed myself, and have not used violence in any form for over 10 years.

Taking my Dad out, will be a challenge I wont win. The first person to look at him the wrong way, or make a derogatory comment will undo 10 years of hard work.

I admire ALL those that can endure the comments and looks and remain passive and calm.

Thank you, for bringing this to light

Love Light & Peace

Armfeetandtoe

Armfeetandtoe, don't underestimate yourself. Can't you just try a 'brief' outing with your dad to begin with? Then see how you feel - without doubting yourself totally?

Sounds like you are very STRONG now. Won't you give it a try for your dad's sake AND yours. You may just regret not having even tried it when you no longer have him.....Just a caring thought.

Take someone you TRUST - with you-just in case.

Arm

Re taking your Dad out.

Nice to see some well intentioned - and heartfelt - comments here.

I think you're right not to take your Dad out. It's just too personal for you. I used to take an able bodied man into town, acting as his carer. He looked fine, but had issues. He would just laugh in people's faces for no apparent reason, and the number of times I had to calm people down who challenged him - I lost count.

It was easier because I was working to assist the man, doing a job, which made it easier to maintain a distance and calmly explain the situation to people. Had he been a family member, my reaction would probably have been markedly different, because I would have taken it personally.

If you're torn about taking your Dad out, do it with a carer, or carers. Let them deal with your Dad, and you just try to enjoy it.

So many times I had to take over with a patient when family members were fazed by a situation. The carer does it all the time and is quite accustomed to dealing with it.

I wish you well if you do take him out, but I wouldn't do it one to one - too personal.

I hope this helps.

Regards

Skoob.

Bangers (old one's, I can't get the young one's any more!)

Just back from our weekly therapy visit with Bear our Golden Retriever.
After 4 years can't tell you how many people that either didn't want to see him, or were afraid of him he's won over....even all the care givers stop to visit with him since he is such an ambassador of good will and loving attention...

We do have trouble in the Alzheimer's wing, and he is uncomfortable there as some of the people are very unpredictable....a few years ago md. morse asked one old timer if he wanted to pet her dog....he proceeded to pat her ass...lovingly!

We have several folks over the years that never interacted with anybody, but came alive, in their own way, when they met the Bear....and he never forgets
anybody who shows they like him...he's a remarkable animal with a human
spirit of empathy that is innate...do you folks in the UK have therapy dogs
over your way? They can work wonders.

Morse

Sorry to here about your father, Armfeetandtoe.

But back to sausages.
The standard of sausages has slipped in recent times.
The only ones I trust nowadays are the little cocktail ones.
The big ones are just full of too much water to pump up their size and some other diseased crap.
They go of before their expiry date too.

And don't get me started on milk.

Yes we do Cap.

Maybe not as cute as Bear (I've seen the pics - the one where he's got snow in his face is my favourite) but we do have them.

I spent a year as a care worker - and I think it was valuable life experience. The pay was crap though, so I had to move on to do other things with better pay.

I'll never forget that year though - I worked with people with brain injuries, and then with the homeless. It takes it out of you but it's an enriching experience.

Hats off to people like Morsie who gives his time for free to those in need.

Regards

Skoob.

Great thread is this..

Enriching to hear such tales..

I do stroke victims every Thursday..

I used to serve the drinks every night in a cancer hospice..

I enjoyed doing that..

Yeah...

time for a glass...

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Quote: Colonel Juan

Great thread is this..

Enriching to hear such tales..

I do stroke victims every Thursday..

I used to serve the drinks every night in a cancer hospice..

I enjoyed doing that..

Yeah...

time for a glass...

---

Skoob & CJ: Count our Blessings!

I'll drink to that.

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Quote: Skoob1999

Some people have real problems accepting that others can be damaged. I think it's a bit sad. It can be daunting working with people who exhibit challenging behaviour, but it can also be very rewarding.

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I wish more people felt that way.

God bless you, Skoob.

Regards,

Damaged

Taking above comments to be true (you never know here) I think you are a grand caring bunch with hearts of gold.


As for 'sausages' - I hear Morrisons are discontinuing their pork sausages are they were found to be made from beef, and they are discontinuing their beef sausages because they were found to be made from pork, which really upset and confused their Muslim and Hindu customers.

People are wondering if their is a 'comedian' working in the sausage-making factory.

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Quote: Lady Godiva

Taking above comments to be true (you never know here) I think you are a grand caring bunch with hearts of gold.


As for 'sausages' - I hear Morrisons are discontinuing their pork sausages are they were found to be made from beef, and they are discontinuing their beef sausages because they were found to be made from pork, which really upset and confused their Muslim and Hindu customers.

People are wondering if their is a 'comedian' working in the sausage-making factory.

---

AS our succinct resident Doc would say, (not to you LG):

STUFF IT!

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Quote: Lady Godiva

Taking above comments to be true (you never know here) I think you are a grand caring bunch with hearts of gold.


As for 'sausages' - I hear Morrisons are discontinuing their pork sausages are they were found to be made from beef, and they are discontinuing their beef sausages because they were found to be made from pork, which really upset and confused their Muslim and Hindu customers.

People are wondering if their is a 'comedian' working in the sausage-making factory.

---

AS our succinct resident Doc would say, (not to you LG):

STUFF IT!

Carers are treated with such disdain by the government and the establishments they work for. The pay is crap. The conditions are crap. And they are overworked.

My Dad is in a place in Salisbury, it is clean, homely and the staff are fantastic. What we do without them? What if they decided to go on strike?

Thank you, Lady G and SKOOB, your advice and sentiments are worthy and help to balance the mental anguish that fills my mind when I think about the situation.

I may give it a go, but with the help of an experienced Carer.

Arm...you DO it - with help of course - or you may regret it. Let's know how it goes.

I enjoy several "gang-Bangers" now and then although it's "hard" to "keep it up" these days

Try splinting the sausages with a couple of McCain Oven Fries tied to them with spaghetti. That should do the trick.

Failing that, stand on your head!

Naked when it's minus thirty.

Yes, that should do the trick!

Add a bit of 'old nippy' cheese.

Arm as a reformed gangster you should know what a silencing effect a horse's severed head next to the old 'un in the wheel chair and a menacing frown on your face will have on the onlookers. You'll be able to leave the Uzzi at home

I could have been in the Mafia - but I had a paper round.

Regards

Skoob.

I could have been a Mafia Moll but I wasn't ugly enough!