HRH Prince Phillip, Duke of Edinburgh - My Fake Diary

Tuesday, 7 July 2015

Dear Diary-

I've been feeling insecure as of late, finding it increasingly difficult to live this daily charade of being so-called royalty. I fear the time will soon come when my subjects (peasants, surfs, and miscellaneous commoners) will wise up to the fact that I'm nothing but a pathetic imbecile - the result of many centuries of continuous, incestuous inbreeding in an effort to preserve the purity of the family bloodline.

But then again, the joke will be on them when history vindicates me by showing how stupid they were to worship an idiot like me. Now I feel better.