Multi-Billionaire gives away life savings after finding out he was in the 1%

Funny story written by Mac McKim

Wednesday, 1 July 2020

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"Sorry, everyone, I didn't know I was hoarding it" he says

New York- Multi-billionaire, Jack Moneybags, has given away 85% of his personal wealth this morning, after finding out that he was one of the few people in the top 1%.

"This whole time, I thought having this much money was normal," says Mr. Moneybags. "I thought everyone lived this way. Now I feel bad. Once I found out, I immediately started giving it all away."

Mr. Moneybags has, as of now, donated over 6 billion dollars to food banks across the country, as well as schools, orphanages, homeless shelters and various movements like Black Lives Matter. "I even helped pay off part of the States' debt for masks and respirators," he recounts.

When asked about the 1%, he stated: "Yeah, I had always heard of it, but I thought it was something from an episode of the X Files. I just assumed everyone was talking about the show."

When questioned about his plans moving forward, he says he will move somewhere to coach little league baseball, and live in a cheap apartment with 2 other roommates.

He has made it clear to the press that he will not return to his lavish lifestyle because "playing x box with my roommates and working at Taco Bell is much more fun than owning half the country's businesses."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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