London man concerned that best friend had erection during man-hug

Written by Johnny Shlep

Saturday, 31 August 2019

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A 30-year-old man from Whitechapel in East London, has expressed concern that his long-time best friend may have been sporting an erection when they greeted each other with an embrace in Leman Street last Saturday evening.

Toby Dell, a night-watchman in a forklift truck warehouse, told us: "I spotted my mate across the street and ran over for a chat. We had a quick man-hug as we hadn't seen each other for a couple of months.

"It was then that I felt something hard pressing against my leg. I'm almost certain he had a boner, or, at the very least, a lazy lob on.

"I immediately broke off the hug and hurried away, shouting over my shoulder that I had to meet the old woman and take her to Tescos.

"I'm hoping that it was down to the fact that he'd recently spotted a really fit bird in the street, or that he'd just heard that West Ham had beaten Chelsea 1-0 at home, or something along those lines."

This latest incident comes just two weeks after a 28-year-old man from Shadwell stabbed his oldest friend to death after accusing him of being aroused, as they shook hands in the street outside a branch of DIY store, B&Q, only to discover that his pal had just purchased a new torch and had it in his pocket.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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