Survey reveals staff and pupils at London school have all seen each other's genitals online

Written by Johnny Shlep

Friday, 12 July 2019

image for Survey reveals staff and pupils at London school have all seen each other's genitals online
A school in the olden days when staff and pupils tended to keep their pants on

It was revealed yesterday, that all the staff and pupils at a secondary school in Shoreditch, East London, have at one time or other, seen each other’s genitalia on various social media platforms such as Snapchat and WhatsApp.

The school newspaper, The Shoreditch Academy Bugle, made the findings after an intensive survey carried out over 12 weeks.

The paper’s editor-in-chief, Toby Dell, 16, revealed: ‘It’s absolutely normal for kids to post pics of their cocks and growlers online these days, and for them to be passed around the school, but we were a bit surprised to find the staff were at it too.

“In fact, some of the younger staff members were in pretty decent nick, it has to be said.

“Miss Wickstead, the PE mistress, for example, had a cracking set of bangers on her, as did, Mrs Parkes, the art teacher, although, to be honest, she could do with trimming that quim a tad.”

The Headteacher, Terence Carter, 63, has now resigned his post after being subjected to online bullying from a number of parents who were less than impressed by the size of his cock.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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