Eriksson denies Nottingham move was for the 'honey'

Funny story written by Not The Nine O'clock News

Wednesday, 22 July 2009


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image for Eriksson denies Nottingham move was for the 'honey'
Women: A bone of contention for Eriksson wherever he goes.

Nottingham: Famed for its 5-1 ratio of women to men, the city of Nottingham was chosen by Sven Goran Eriksson for his move back into the English football league, as he joined Notts County as director of football.

At a packed press conference today held by the club, womanising Eriksson denied he had joined the club solely for the amount of women he could have.

Asked if he knew of the alleged ratio whereby women outnumber men, he responded "Yes of course I do, which honourable dogging swede doesn't, but I have come here for the moneys, not the honeys. Of course it is an advantage" he said as took a call on his mobile during the press conference "and sometimes it is not" he chuckled as he was heard to say 'he would be round later' to a female voice on the other end.

Surprise was the order of the day as Eriksson chose lowly Notts County rather than the lure of Italy, Spain or the Premier league to reignite his football career, after being sacked as Mexico coach.

Continued Eriksson "There has been much talk about this move and that I only came for the pussy on offer, well it's just not true. I still have a flat in London and there's plenty there I can tell you"

Revealed Eriksson "Mexico was shit, I didn't know whether they were boys or girls half the time and I only found out at the last minute when I saw the dangling balls"

Asked if he was prepared to talk about football rather than women, Eriksson snapped and re-iterated his stance that he only arrived for the money - "What? Football? here at Notts County? You joke with me yes?"

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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