Formula One Set To Re-Introduce Dolly-Birds...

Funny story written by Scooter Nairns

Monday, 31 August 2020

image for Formula One Set To Re-Introduce Dolly-Birds...
"I can sing and dance too, as you know!"

After the age old debate of 'What Came First - The Chicken Or The Egg?', Formula One has had its fair share of similar debates. The biggest one being, 'Is This Even A Sport?'

After years of pub fights, ruined Sundays, and even days when you thought you'd never miss this expensive charade, up pops F1 Demi-God, Nigel Mansell, to claim that chicken farming brings him more joy than driving these days.

The mustachioed wonder, who has clearly had too many hits to the head, also claimed that Sundays are actually far less boring since he switched off the idiot-box and started going for a walk in the local cemetery.

"The so-called 'sport' is a waste of time, effort, technology and money. The whole thing is a sham. Even the champagne that you see them cracking open on the podium - it's just cleverly designed cheap cider supplied by Mohammad's Offy. For years, the whole organisation has just been driving round and round in circles. I can do that on the X-Box," spat Mansell.

Pushed further, Mansell claimed the whole shebang needs some characters and personalities. Some razzmatazz, some oomph!

"Bringing back the dolly-birds that held up the cards would certainly be a 'bumper' revamp. I'd certainly turn on the telly to see that! Just don't tell the wife!"

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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