Dominique Strauss-Kahn, the head of the International Monetary Fund, was arrested in New York this week for allegedly raping a chambermaid in his hotel room.

It looks like the IMF chief's visit to America is going to be a long one because these are the best alibis that the lawyers came up with:

1. Was auditioning housekeepers for his friend Arnold Schwarzenegger.

2. Goes crazy when he hears the word "bedspread."

3. Is internationally licensed to evaluate personal assets.

4. His English/French dictionary botched the definition of "room service."

5. Heard that Rikers Island has the best French Toast.

6. No time for sex crimes; too busy with fraud.