Passed over for a promotion at the Boogertown Hordees, little 20-year-old pissy-britches Brandon Fartface Willson had the gall to file a lawsuit against this wonderful restaurant Monday, claiming to be a victim of age discrimination of all things.
"Just because someone has 25 more years of experience, that doesn't automatically make him more qualified than my young client," said rat-faced, liquor-nosed attorney Martin Pissbreath Phelps, who represents the whiny little shit.
"In his first seven months on the job, Mr. Willson has more than proven his potential."
Meanwhile, the little peckerhead was unavailable for comment.
Even though this reporter owns stock in Hordees, Inc., the Boogertown Banner takes no stand on the little crybaby who's probably hiding right now at home behind his mommy's ample posterior that's become famous for clearing out shopping lanes at WallyMart!