Written by Skoob1999

Thursday, 16 October 2008

Legendary Neasden hard-nut,gangster and underworld crime kingpin Arthur Pewty granted us an exclusive interview concerning his thoughts on a variety of things.

On Gordon Ramsay:

Fair enough, he can cook a bit, but if he spoke to me like he speaks to some of them people on Hell's Kitchen I'd knock his sodding block off.

On The Leaning Tower Of Pisa:

It's not straight is it? It's not! It's pissed. Only the Italians could make a tourist attraction out of a building code violation.

On Tap Dancing Elephants:

That's just cruel. Elephants were never designed for tap dancing. It's just wrong.

On Al Pacino:

Fair play to him, he's a good actor, but he shouts all the bloody time, a bit like the wife. And, I'll never understand why they keep casting him as a hard-man. He's like, about three foot tall, he can't even see over the top of a car. Just imagine, somebody tells you Al Pacino's gonna get you... You'd shit your pants, with laughter.

On Tom And Jerry:

Do you know, I'd love to see a Tom and Jerry where Tom catches that bastard mouse and tortures him to death. See the blood. Hear the screams. I love cats. I hate mice. End of.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!
Topics: Arthur Pewty
More by this writer
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story

Go to top
33 readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more