Written by Pointer

Tuesday, 14 October 2008

image for McCain Claims: I'm That Troubled One to Lead a Troubled Nation! Troubled America, I am you!

Washington had whalebone teeth. Lincoln suffered from depression. Grant was often drunker than W in the frat days. Arthur was ginormous and Roosevelt was in a wheelchair and had a really homely wife which is why he gave so much dictation to his secretary, but that's a spoof for another time. Truman blew up cities. Eisenhower was boring. Kennedy watched too many movie starlets and Nixon was a crook. Reagan was senile and Clinton's penis had an oral fixation. W made every other president's troubles look and feel like a little intestinal gas easily resolved with a burp or a fart.

Into this context John McCain told the American people today that he is the troubled man to lead a troubled nation. Mccain enumerated the troubles that he and the nation share:

"We are both irreparably scarred by Vietnam. We both needed to bailed out of economic trouble by an influx of somebody else's big bucks. We worry that a woman or a black person will get the job we were hoping for. life sometimes reminds us of a prison and we have a crazy fantasy that we can be saved from our ordinariness by a sexy stranger.

"Troubled America, I am you and you are me! Coo, coo, ca choo!"

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!
More by this writer
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story

Go to top
49 readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more