Infamous law firm, Dewey, Cheatham and Howe have filed a controversial lawsuit between near life long friends. JRNombligo, World Muff diving Champion and his old buddy, X. Sal Pointer, King of the Electric cock ring had a tragic falling out this weekend over a dark driveway, a misplaced volcanic boulder and six really good bottles of Barolo.
Though details seem a bit muddled it appears that someone drank six excellent bottles of Barolo, apparently to block out a pedantic oenophilic lecturer whose scholarly works have been compared to super sized Sominex.
At some point in the evening XS Pointer was seen to be wandering in the driveway of the Nombligo estate. Witnesses reported that the victim was found with deep abrasions and profusely bleeding wounds to the ankle and second toe of his sandaled right foot. Barrister Rob M. Blinde of Dewey, Cheatham and Howe explained in his deposition that Mr. Pointer was found in a negligently illuminated driveway with a jagged volcanic boulder above his right foot.
The lawsuit is seeking unspecified damages for the following: 1) negligence in allowing a clearly impaired individual to be staggering about a poorly lit driveway 2) malign intent in the placement of a jagged volcanic boulder right where a clearly impaired individual could get his right foot severely scraped 3) alienation of affection since XS Pointer's wife has a particular erotic attachment to the second toe on his right foot and she will not be able to suck said appendage for quite a few days 4) repayment for the blood stained carpet of XSP's really pissed off daughter-in law who is seeking a new car in the case since "There is no way to get blood out of my SUV carpet, you stupid drunk!"
The thespoof.com promises to continue to cover the case all the way up to the Supreme Court where it is rumored Justice Clarence Thomas will say his first words and write his first opinion in five years. Mr. Pointer's association as the stand in double for Long Dong Silver has aroused Thomas' interest.