In a private weekend away Sir Eton John, the original rocket man took off from cape Knieval, Arizona with his partner David Furnish for an 'Out of this world' experience.
Safely aboard the pink painted ex-soviet rocket(te), the 'Eltonauts' blasted off into the cloudless Arizona sky. As the rocket climbed towards the sun, it was thought they were heading for Mars to see if what David Bowie said was true.
In front of them was a NASA rocket already on its way on a mission there. Its probe was clearly visible strapped to the side of the rocket.
"I've got a bigger, more sensitive probe than that 'pencil'" bragged Elton "And there's a lot more lead in mine!"
"Oh, Great Balls of Fire! There's no privacy up here" shrieked Elton going off on one of his tantrums. "Let's turn round a go somewhere a little quieter, besides, the sun is making me so hot I'm going to have to remove my shirt." He said seductively to his lover.
He manoeuvred the spacecraft around and headed towards 'The dark Side of the Moon' (Oh shit, I've got the wrong records here!). Elton had wanted to go 'where no man has gone before'.
As they went past Venus, David pointed out of the window and was heard to say: "Gosh look at all those triangles, Reggy"
As they approached Jupiter, Elton wrestled with the controls, sweat pouring of his balding bonce. "This is going to be a bumpy ride!" he shouted. "I've never seen so many moons - I'm becoming aroused!"
On they went, both shaken and stirred - on and on.
"What's them Reggy?" David asked.
"Those are rings David; I thought you'd like to see other rings besides mine?"
"They're not as tight as yours, I didn't feel a thing. Lover!"
After a while, they reached the next planet. Elton pointed it out;
"Isn't it beautiful? Elton asked. "This is… URANUS."
"I've never seen my anus, but you have"
"No, no, no, my friend; this planet is called Uranus."
"Oh I thought you were poking fun at me." Said David.
"Not at all, I just thought I'd treat you to the trip of a lifetime. Gosh! What's those spots I can see?"