Written by Jaggedone

Monday, 18 June 2018

image for VIVA ZAPATA!! No Bratwurst at the Nutters Beach Club or Sauerkrauts! Just tortillas and Burritos on Dia veinteuno!! Not quite Zapata, but he'll do to put the Sauerkrauts to the sword!

VIVA ZAPATA!! No Bratwurst at the Nutters Beach Club or Sauerkrauts! Just tortillas and Burritos on Dia veinteuno!!

Our Chinese chief Chef, WAN-KIN-DIK, has created a superb dish for tonight's England bash: Sauerkrauts smothered in Red Hot Mexican chili peppers with his hard, spicy sausage as a dip! It promises to be a white-hot, combustible back-burner, and our bogs have been especially aired for the occasion!

Meanwhile, our brilliant, scientific, philosophical owner, Jaggedone, has discovered the secret to human existence whilst studying a bag of frozen peas left to melt by his WAN-KIN-DIK and here it is.

We, the human race, are driven solely by our pea-brains. They revolve around our heads like the earth revolves around the sun. Hence giving us life, a purpose and, the reason why we are all here ever since our brains left the pods. They are round, and the same shape as the planets, only smaller, but just as worthless as planets millions of miles away, which are either too hot or too cold to exist on! Planet earth is the only place where our pea-brains could manifest themselves and God (Who the F is he?) entered them and, gave us a Trump card, who owns a majestic pea-brain so little peas just follow!

This ladies and gentleman is our sole purpose to be here, apart from members of the Nutters Beach Club, who do not have pea-brains, actually. They have coconuts between their ears and the writer of this crap just saw a Mexican monkey driving a Mercedes!

Adios Amigos et Viva Zapata una vez mas ! Con all guns blazing!!!

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!
More by this writer
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story



Go to top
71 readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more