Written by dave nelson

Wednesday, 25 February 2015

image for New Research proves "The Price is Right" causes Brain Damage the price is brain damage

"The ONLY question we have is - whether ONLY brain damaged people watch it - OR -the show causes it?" said Dr. Moishe Pipick -head of The Worldwide Neurological Center in Berne, Switzerland.

He continued:"The evidence is absolutely conclusive - these folks either come to the show part nutsy -or are driven that way - probably it's a combo effect!"

"Another amazing finding is that when put through behavioral analysis like -you know -the ones that showed how Chimps will keep pushing the lever for Cocaine instead of food -these "Price is Right" freakos preferred shopping and bling titillation more than life ITSELF!"

"Well Doctor,"asked one of the Institute's Scientists -what are your recommendations ?"

Dr. Pipick replied "Watch them closely! - Neuter them all! - and consider Euthanasia!

Drew Carey also weighed in: "I have stopped puking everyday at the thought of hosting this show for crap crazed morons - I no longer think of killing myself and have accepted the fact that i sold my soul for money -and i just think of the gorgeous hookers waiting for me every night"

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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