Written by Nate John Won

Wednesday, 18 February 2015

image for The sayings and proverbs of Nate John Won

* Eager to possess a pair of trendy newsprint pants? Then invest in a trouser press.

* Bah! Hircine thieves! They really get my goat!

* Beware the Ides of March (and the 'orns of April).

* Catch a falling star and put it in your pocket, if you want hot pants.

* Practice makes perfict
Practice makes perficked
Practice makes perfect

* On the first day of Christmas my true love sent to me - a photocopy of the poem 'The Twelve Days of Christmas' - lazy old so-and-so.

* The definition of real pain? Instructing your pet hen to lay the table.

* These days I am computer literate. (I mean I actually know how to spell C-O-M-P-U-T-E-R).

* So you really want to succeed? Well, then it is best to used soft-boiled lentils.

* Never throw in the towel - unless you are a competitor in a towel-slinging contest.

* Be a supplier of alms, and not a trader of arms.

* God will bless the cheerful singer - however tuneless he may be.

* To eat a hearty meal is good - to eat a spleeny dessert is not so good.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!
Topics: Proverbs
More by this writer
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story



Go to top
66 readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more