Governor John Hickeypooper said in a press conference today: "The state constitution limits how much tax money the state can take in before it has to give some back. That means Coloradans may each get their own cut of the $50 million in recreational pot taxes collected in the first year of legal weed. It's a situation so bizarre that it's gotten Republicans and Democrats, for once, to agree on a tax issue."
He stated: "We are making so much money off weed that folks are recommending we extend the legalization to some harder drugs."
Colorado Rocky Mountain High reporter Moishe Pipick asked: "Well what about the health and addiction issues?"
The Governor replied: "Well folks are gonna get high on whatever no matter what we do so maybe we should haul in all that drug moola and make life easier around here for folks!"
He went on; "I mean you look at Saudi Arabia where everyone gets a share of the Oil money and Alaska gives folks a yearly check from their Oil and those folks seem real happy to me OH OH AND with the drugs we are not hurting the environment - you just remember that!"
Reporter Pipick asked The Governor; "Well aren't you all a bit nervous about outside criminal elements taking over and crime and violence issues?"
Hickeypooper replied; "Nah - Every household in Colorado has closets full of guns and they can handle the criminal elements and with all that money comin in we can beef up our local police with Drones and APV's and the latest Military hardware."
He concluded; 'bring em on!"