Written by Pointer

Wednesday, 4 April 2007

Dear Readers, P4YG has been virtually inundated with questions related to religion and sex during the high holidays. We have decided to offer our advise in seperate columns, each dedicate to the particular religious tradition.

The chosen people go first because we wouldn't want to argue with Yahweh considering the fire, brimstone and such. . . So here's a compendium of sexsual advice to our Jewish letter writers. Hope you can match your question to our answer:

If she smells like a gefilte fish, it's probably not Kosher. . .

Blood on the lintel means you'll most likely be swimming the Red Sea. . .

No, we do not know of any pesach lamb flavored condoms!

Yes, the Passover questions can be asked by the youngest, even if they are gay. . . In fact the queer folk tend to be very inquisitive!

No! We know of no sex act called the "Filthy Moses" But we have enjoyed immensely the "Dirty Delilah" Please be careful with the scissors!

Sex with a Jew for Jesus during Passover is permitted as long as you do not block the synagogue aisle. . .

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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Topics: Religion
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