Written by Auntie Matter

Wednesday, 27 August 2014

image for The Top-Ten Best Selling Singles of All Time The Ones they all Dance.


1. If you leave me, I will kill myself.

2. If you don't leave me, I will kill myself.

3. I can't live without you. Until I get over it.

4. I would want to kill you if you ever left me but, as I am such a nice guy, I must spare you.

5. The first time ever I saw your face, I thought the Sun rose in your eyes. Now that you've fucked up, I hope you rot in hell, you dumb bastard!

6. I love you because you look so fine. In fact, I would rather go to bed with Mussolini than Adolf Hitler any day. How lucky are you?

7. You taught me to love myself; I want to kill myself I feel so unworthy.

8. When you leave me for her, you will regret it... some day. I have the police and the Catholic Church on my side.

9. You left me, and now I am dying, and it is all your fault.

10. I was happy before I met you... and I'll be
still happy when you go.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!
More by this writer
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story

Go to top
56 readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more