Written by blewkarma

Saturday, 17 March 2007

image for Jack vs Makers The Long War Virgin of Guadelupe

Drip, drip, drip went the incessant sound that accompanied the seeping, sodden, matter leaking from Mr. Jack Daniels ceiling.

"I was astonished, yet pleased, that after all these years it had finally arrived" Mr. Daniels remarked.

"Sure it's a bit of a bother but we're making history" Mrs. Daniels proudly chimed in referring to a spattering of buckets, pails and pots on her living room floor retrieving the slow steady trickle.

"After 22 long years would you believe?" Günter Daniels, Jack's live in, recovering alcoholic, younger brother added for emphasis.

The younger Daniels was referring to January 22 1984 when President Ronald Reagan made the first recorded reference to "The trickle-down economy" in his State Of The Union speech. The theory postulates that large tax cuts to the top 8% of wealthy Americans, referred to in these pages as the Imperial Crown of the American Plutocracy, combined with special interest subsidies to corporations and industries would create substantial benefits for the lower 92% of Americans, referred to as "the rest of us".

It's derisively dismissed as "trickle-down economics" because the theory behind supply-side economics is supposedly that wealth created largely at the top of the economic ladder will "trickle-down" to those at the bottom end.

It all began when Mr. Daniels upstairs neighbor Mr. "Old Big Daddy" Mark Maker installed an enormous hot tub in his living room directly above Mr. Daniels after receiving a large tax cut and substantial subsidies for his upscale bourbon distillery located in posh east Bloats Ville.

"We had been struggling along just trying to make ends meet in a day to day 'Rob Peter to pay Paul' type sub-standard existence" said Mr. Daniels

"Things were getting pretty bad but then it all began to change about two or three weeks ago"

The change that Mr. Daniels is referring to is when "Old Big Daddy" Maker made the decision to fill his new hot tub with his "top shelf" brand of bourbon due to the high cost of tap water caused by the Long War on Terror. "One mans negligence is another mans gravy train" Mr. Daniels said insisting that a faulty plumbing seal appeared to him as the Virgin of Gudelupe which resulted in the leak thus causing the steady trickle.

"It's kind of like the Israelites in the desert getting all that manna you know" Mrs. Daniels remarked

"The Lord works in mysterious ways" Günter replied after downing a vase peaked to the brim "Praise be his mighty works."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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