Written by Tony Bagodonutz

Wednesday, 30 October 2013

1. Wear a pair of vinyl boy shorts, stick some feathers in your ass - "Shakesgiving Twerky"

2. Stick a fork in your ass and say "I'm getting forked in the ass"

3. Keep all of your clothes on and go as an Unemployed Stripper.

4. Dress up as Julianne Hough dressed as "Crazy Eyes" from Orange Is the New Black ; When you're given grief for your decision, respond, "It's not racial. I'm dressing as a white actress."

5. Colorado T-shirt, a box full of cooking pots with a "for sale" sign - Pot Dispensary

6. A shaved head, a redish brown mustache, glasses, a doll, a bottle, a binky, and an empty wallet - Breaking Dad

7. Walk around naked licking a hammer, followed by a flock of mutilated midgets, singing "Hi hoe, hi hoe, it's off twerk we go" - Miley Cyrus performing Hammer Time

8. Find the cheapest plastic "Iron Man Mask" you can find, apply dabs of Vaseline on it, and sprinkle flour or baking soda that sticks to the mask. Wear it along with jeans, a t-shirt, and a suit coat. - Robert Downey Jr. is back to his old habits.

9. Wear a suit, take money from people with nothing in return, argue. - A member of Congress

10. Wear a t-shirt displaying various cyber speak acronyms such as "LOL", "OMG", etc. and walk around with a fiending, creepy, drooling, hungry look - "Acronymphomaniac"

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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Topics: Halloween
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