Showing breaking news satire snippets written by UncleDale.

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Liz Cheney Can't be Elected in her Own State-but will Run for President 2024.

Good Luck.....delusional Liz Cheney...

written by UncleDale, 17 August 2022

Barbie Co. has Developed a Barbie Doll Wearing Hearing Aids

For those little hearing impaired girls out there(all two of you).
What girls want are breast implant dolls-where they can give a Barbie bigger and bigger breasts-just like the neighborhood girls.

written by UncleDale, 17 August 2022

Prince Charles Revealed

Charles was in Scotland,and a gust of wind lifted his Kilt and revealed his shocking secret. He doesn't wear British underwear-but had those Ball lifting American Jockey Shorts. Camilla's Influence?

written by UncleDale, 16 August 2022

Jesus was Kicked out of Pub for Drunkeness

Brazilian Soccer player, Jesus tres Santos, was kicked out of the Bull and Scrotum in Daftsdale for Drunkeness and arguing about Gays in Soccer. 100% Hetero in Britain-100% Hetero in Soccer.

written by UncleDale, 16 August 2022

Trump 'Taking Down' Liz Cheney- Politically

A Mafia 'Don' can take down a Gang member-doesn't mean he is Competent, himself.
Just means he has some Power over others-can fool people.
Evangelicals are Delusional already-easy to fool.

written by UncleDale, 16 August 2022

Miller HIgh Life Maskes an Ice Cream Bar that Tastes like a Really Shitty Beer.

The Ice cream makes-in retaliation-are going to start making Alcoholic ice creams.

written by UncleDale, 16 August 2022

Ukraine Grain Goes to Africa-it's Never Enough

A UN official said-"we are puzzled. We send tons of grain to Africa--save them from starvation.Then they get healthy-have big families. Then-famine-again-we send more Aid.
Puzzling and never ending.

written by UncleDale, 15 August 2022

Foxy U.S.Weather Forcast July-August, 2022

There is a big disturbance near Mar-a-Lago....Might become a major Storm later this month..
This Disturbance has already caused numerous small violent storms all over the country.

written by UncleDale, 15 August 2022

A Family Owes Many Millions and Won't Pay their Bills

Part of the Family wants to pay off the Debt-the other half screams No-so they just keep spending. One day the Debt.will Bankrupt the Family.
This is our Crazy, No Taxes Ever Conservative Congress

written by UncleDale, 14 August 2022

Monkey Pox to be Renamed said World Health Organization.

They feel Primate Pox is more dignified. Tarzan's pox was popular-(blame it on the white guy). King Leopold's Congo pox- for historical reasons. The oddball French wanted 'Le lesions Dangereuse'

written by UncleDale, 14 August 2022

Trump to Franchise Wife Burials at Golf Courses.

This will open a new source of income for all golf courses, (and Trump). Rates will vary, depending on what Hole you want to bury the wife next to.
Budget burials will be next to the Putting Greens.

written by UncleDale, 14 August 2022

Putin Laughing Ass Off at America Being Destroyed By Conservatives

Getting Donaldski elected President was worth 20 battalions of Russian Troops. Only problem-him not getting re-elected. If he'd been re-elected-I would Own Ukraine by now.
Now, have to fight Biden

written by UncleDale, 14 August 2022

Big Floods in Las Vegas-As in Other Parts of the Country

Gamblers were flooded right out into the streets clutching Roulette Wheels-still trying to make bets. Chorus girls were up to their G strings in flood waters-but rescued by young firefighters.

written by UncleDale, 13 August 2022

Nude Pics. of Stormy Daniels Found In Trump's Safe By FBI

One had an inscription on the back-"You are still the best ,Donnie,Wonnie, and signed with a surprising graceful Large S.
(P.S.-I think the Wife knows")-continued the inscription.

written by UncleDale, 13 August 2022

Right Wing Female English Professor Impaled by Anti Trump Sign

A woman stole an anti Trump sign from a neighbor and threw it away. The Wind caught it and blew it back and impaled her.
She fell down-"hoisted by my own Petard" she said, and died.

written by UncleDale, 12 August 2022

China and Africa Main Source of Viruses-the CDC Says.

China-because they sleep with their farm animals.
Africa- because they stripping the jungles of all animals-they are so hungry-and they multiply like mad.

written by UncleDale, 12 August 2022

Ferret News-Gestapo FBI Kicked Down Door at Mar-a-Lago

Mar-a-Lago trashed...porno room wrecked. This is worse than Hitler- the Raid-all for No Good Reason. Just because he had the Capitol trashed. Democratic Pay-back.
Tucker-Conspiracy Theories at 7.

written by UncleDale, 12 August 2022

Liz Truss To Follow Margaret Thatcher's Philosophy

Starve the Poor and Feed the Rich. Less housing for the Poor.
More tax cuts for Business. Thatcher's 'Greed is Good' Philosophy will be back.

written by UncleDale, 12 August 2022

Top Secret Doc's Found Found In Triump's Bathroom at Mar a Lago.

The FBI went in to with a legal Search warrant, and they found the suspected pile of documents in Trump's bathroom. They were next to the toilet, and no toilet paper was in the room.

written by UncleDale, 12 August 2022

New Crime in the World- Russia Holding a Nuke Power Plant Hostage

Russia is occupying the biggest nuke power in Europe-in Ukraine. They built it-so will probably destroy it when leaving. This is the first new Crime invented in years-
Nuke Hostage taking.

written by UncleDale, 12 August 2022

Trump Destroying Biden-By All His-Trump's-Bad Publicity

Whenever Biden achieves something Good-I swamp him with my Bad Boy publicity. He hasn't a Chance. I have done so much Bad Shit, I can keep him buried and out of off the News till 2024.
Biden Who?

written by UncleDale, 12 August 2022

Battle for England-Truss and Sunak Both Agree-More Corporate Tax Cuts.

The main problem with the Economy is not enough Corporate tax cuts, both candidate agree. Other wise a great economy-(as seen from the Limo). We are back to the happy, prosperous Thatcher Days.

written by UncleDale, 11 August 2022

In NY City Deposition-Trump Pleaded the Fifth 440 Times.

Trump even Pleaded the Fifth on his name- 'I don't remember'.
After that-asked what Time it was, he pleaded the Fifth-"you are trying to trick, aren't you?
Opinion-Possible BigMacitis of the brain

written by UncleDale, 11 August 2022

Trump Drinks a Fifth-Then Takes the Fifth in NY City Deposition.

"You know I have never drank before in my life, said Trump.
Because I always had the pull or money to avoid Court.
It was great stuff. That Janis Joplin had the right idea about Southern Comfort."

written by UncleDale, 11 August 2022

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