Showing breaking news satire snippets written by C/L.Show all snippets.
Russian Special Operations Bake Sale
Vladimir Putin to officially approve Russian Government bake sale to continue it's Imperialist military failure in the Ukraine!
Steven Bannon Kidnapped by Vatican Bishops
Bannon last sighted sitting at Pope Francis's feet, wearing a dog collar and nothing else.
China Threatens Self Invasion Exercises to the U.S. Government
Said that if they didn't sell so much to Wal Mart, that they would practice on Taiwan instead!
Jared Kushner to Open Special Press Butcher Market
The Saudi Prince, and Jared Kushner will be selling premium butchered journalists to dictatorships around the globe.
Stupid Trump Threatens Himself in Classified Documents Probe
Says he'll release classified documents to Mar-a-lago if he squeals on himself in court; To keep his own big mouth shut!
Nasty Nancy Pelosi Threatens China with Sexual Assault
Red army troops to be issued special full body condom suits; With contraceptive ammunition.
Mitch McConnell Still Angry over Ouster from Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles
In a recent interview with Rolling Stone, Mitch McConnell admits that he is the "Pete Best" of the Ninja Turtles; And Still angry over his thirty year old ouster.
Democrats Continue with Wiemar Republic Strategy
Nancy Pelosi continues to stress a reliance on impotent political strategies, and toadying up to Wall Street; in a bid to accelerate the rise of American Fascism.
Donald Trump Declares Victory in 2024 Presidential Election
Donald Trump has declared an early victory in 2024 Presidential Race. Meanwhile Republican election officials are busy pre-certifying fraudulent votes.
U.S. Mint to Release Gold Coin Commemorating Capitol Insurrection
The U.S. Mint is slated to begrudgingly mint gold coin featuring rioting MAGA crowd on one side, and Donald Trump's likeness on the other.
Russian Troops Bombed in Uber Airstrike Gone Wrong
Drunken Russian troops kill themselves with incorrect coordinates; in an airstrike gone wrong, against, Ukrainian Uber driver.
Amazon Workers to Continue Working Under COVID Threat
Jeff Bezos will acknowledge the existence of workers who survive illness and develop herd immunity.
Mitch McConnell Proposes Anti-Democracy Law
McConnell says that, "Democracy is getting in the way of Republican politics."
North Korea Implements New No Child Policy
Kim Jung-un's 'Yellow Cake Uranium breakfast cereal' is a mandatory hit with kids.
Vladimir Putin Poisons Himself
Citing that he is becoming too great a threat to his own power.
Annie Lennox Threatens to Sue White Supremacist Cover Band
Judge orders 'The Eugenics' to cease and desist all live performances.
Trump to Create Fake Media Outlet
The 'Alternative Reality News Network' will cover Trump's fictitious presidential victory.
Shocking Effect of Trump Defeat on Q-Anon Members
That common sense reality still exists.
Florida Governor Ron DeSantis Botches COVID-19 Response
By banning Corona beer in order to flatten pandemic curve.
written by C/L, 05 May 2020
Whereabouts of Kim Jung Un Discovered
He's stuck in quarantine at Dennis Rodman's house in L.A.
Sales of New COVID-19 Perfume Tank
Industry analysts say the whole project is being ventilated.
President Trump Implements His Meat Industry Relief Plan
Ordering the importation of millions of pounds of bat meat from China.
Mexican Government Praises Drug Cartels for their COVID-19 Etiquette
"Maintaining quarantine guidelines with house to house shoot-outs".
written by C/L, 11 April 2020
Trump Orders Pentagon to Decrease Tank Armor Plating
"They will go strongly faster and get better gas mileage"!
written by C/L, 05 November 2019