Showing breaking news satire snippets written by Alistair D.

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Cyprus To Be Sold For Scrap

Cyprus's creditors have agreed to break the island up and sell it for scrap. The beaches have been sold on to Dubai, the remainder is to be moored in the South China Sea as a floating restaurant.

written by Alistair D, 22 March 2013

Cold Fusion Confirmed

Researchers at MIT have published results of a 4 year study, confirming that when you place a cup of water in the freezer, the liquid fuses together into a solid. “It’s the Holy Grail of science.”

written by Alistair D, 20 April 2005

New Pope To Complete The Quartet

Cardinals gathering in Rome for the forthcoming conclave to choose the next pontiff have at least agreed on a name – George Ringo I ‘to carry on from where John Paul left off’

written by Alistair D, 13 April 2005

Pope Snubs God – Chooses Caribbean

Late Pope John Paul 2nd has decided to spend eternity in the Caribbean instead of Heaven, saying it is “warmer and less old fashioned”. His soul can now be reached on the beach at Barbados.

written by Alistair D, 04 April 2005

God Snubs Pope - Prior Engagement

God has confirmed he will not attend the Pope's funeral if it clashes with Prince Charles and Mrs Parker-Bowles’ wedding. “Fair’s fair – Karol should have checked the date with me before snuffing it”

written by Alistair D, 04 April 2005

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