Showing breaking news satire snippets written by Ralph E. Shaffer.Show all snippets.
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Trump's Economy Created 200,000 Jobs in April
100,000 are telemarketers, and the other 100,000 prepare the robocalls.
written by Ralph E. Shaffer, 17 May 2019
Trump, on the Fight between Heaven and Hell
When asked by his pastor where he stands on the struggle between Heaven and Hell, Donald Trump replied:
"There are very fine people on both sides."
written by Ralph E. Shaffer, 13 May 2019
Supreme Court Disqualifies Trump, Removes him from Presidency
A review of tapes from the Republican 2016 presidential debates reveals that Trump bumped Ohio governor Kasich as the candidates entered the stage for the second debate.
written by Ralph E. Shaffer, 06 May 2019
Trump Abruptly Leaves Ocasio-Cortez's Progressive Dinner
Although Alexandria promised him that the evening would be apolitical, Trump walked out when the salad, served at the EPA building, was all green and he learned that dessert would be rainbow sherbet.
written by Ralph E. Shaffer, 10 April 2019
300,000 Jobs Added in January
How many of those jobs were taken by shutout federal workers?
written by Ralph E. Shaffer, 02 February 2019
Camelot's Crumbling: Attorney Pleads Guilty. Lied to Protect Trump.
I wonder what the Trump is ruing tonight?
What harassment is the Trump reviewing tonight?
Poor Cohen told the court, he lied but now's contrite.
No wonder that the Trump is stewing tonight.
written by Ralph E. Shaffer, 30 November 2018
National Park Service Rewrites Statue of Liberty Plaque
"Give me your strong, your rich, your workers yearning to breathe capitalism. Send no homeless, impoverished, or those seeking refuge from MS-13 to me. I want no trash to tarnish our golden door."
written by Ralph E. Shaffer, 22 June 2018
Moore Wins Alabama Senate Seat; 30,000 Jones votes Invalidated
Tuscaloosa. The Alabama Republican Sec. of State today ruled 30,000 votes for Doug Jones in Montgomery and Birminghan were cast fraudulently by Russian hackers and therefore invalid.
written by Ralph E. Shaffer, 14 December 2017
Trump Threatens to "Totally Destroy" Republican Party
President Donald Trump today expressed his disgust with the Republicans failure to pass any significant legislation. "I will totally destroy the Republican party if this continues."
written by Ralph E. Shaffer, 19 September 2017
God, Man, and Environment at UCLA
The UCLA Summer Band will perform at noon Friday on the steps of Kerckhoff Hall. Featured selections will be Martin Luther's "A Mighty Forest is Our God" and "The Deflater Mouse" by Strauss.
written by Ralph E. Shaffer, 31 July 2017
Man Arrested for Vandalizing Trump's Hollywood Blvd Star
Jail phones clogged as millions offer to post bail.
written by Ralph E. Shaffer, 26 July 2017
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