Showing breaking news satire snippets written by Crunk.

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Court rules in favour of ice pops

Further unpalatable gags re frozen sperm, as we get them...

written by Crunk, 07 March 2014

Pope: 'mi cazzo es su cazzo'

Pope Francis gives slightly-too-welcoming speech. More soon.

written by Crunk, 07 March 2014

Brooks denies being a redhead, but admits to 'intimate ginger moments'

more soon (we are sorry to say)

written by Crunk, 23 February 2014

Rebekah Brookes cleared of all charges of journalism.

more soon.

written by Crunk, 22 February 2014

New Scottish currency confirmed as the giro

more soon, as they get it...

written by Crunk, 19 February 2014

Farting in cars to be outlawed

Farting in private vehicles carrying children is soon to be made illegal. A proposal to allow farts 'if they are set alight' has been dismissed, although expected to be widely ignored by HGV drivers.

written by Crunk, 11 February 2014

Continuing severe politician warning for South of England

Despite the worst influx of senior politicians for decades, meterologists are warning residents of the Somerset Levels that there is worse to come.

written by Crunk, 09 February 2014

Chinese celebrate New Year with Findus Lasagne

more soon.

written by Crunk, 03 February 2014

Union leaders have called for Big Ben to strike

...during the funeral of Baroness Thatcher

written by Crunk, 16 April 2013

Final pit closes on arrival of Mrs Thatcher

more soon

written by Crunk, 14 April 2013

Brian Cox admits to sneezing bigger comets

after an amateur astronomer admits that the photograph that gained world acclaim was actually a bit of greenfly ejecta on his camera lens

written by Crunk, 18 March 2013

Ganstas everywhere celebrate Motherfuckers Day


written by Crunk, 10 March 2013

Huhne in Nectar Points scandal

A disgraced former MP was ejected from a Sainsbury's store today for attempting to redeem points against the cost of his shopping using a Nectar card bearing the name V Pryce

written by Crunk, 01 March 2013

Huhne sentenced to re-marry Pryce as 'deterrent'

Human rights groups have reported they are apalled by the severity of the punishment.

written by Crunk, 06 February 2013

Supermarkets to stock 'GG-free' burger range

...more soon

written by Crunk, 19 January 2013

Don't let hardened criminals out early, says Justice Secretary

"Best wait until they've gone a bit soft. That way you know they are probably satisfied and unlikely to do any harm. In fact they'll probably just go straight to sleep"

written by Crunk, 05 January 2013

McKinnon 'health grounds' revealed to be 'hacking cough'

more soon...

written by Crunk, 15 December 2012

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