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Wikileaks Reveals Photos of Justin Beiber's Naked Forehead

Photos reveal that Bieber's bangs have been hiding the face of Voldemort.

written by Q. William Bacon, 30 November 2010

At Navajo Council Meeting, Kanye West Grabs Talking Stick

West then shouted that Beyonce should be the one chosen to receive the prized necklace of wolves' teeth.

written by Q. William Bacon, 28 November 2010

Apple Introduces Four New Video Devices

Today, CEO Steve Jobs introduced the Iped, Ipud, Ipidl, and Ichildpornography.

written by Q. William Bacon, 28 November 2010

Garrison Keillor to Write Erotic Novel

Mr. Keillor says, "My book will be like chicken soup for the penis."

written by Q. William Bacon, 28 November 2010

Obama Collides with a Large Hadron

President requires stitches after mishap during tour of CERN facility.

written by Q. William Bacon, 28 November 2010

Iranian Wildfowl Leader Denies Existence of Thanksgiving

President I'm-A-Dinner-Jad says, "It's just an excuse for American turkeys to appropriate the name of a great Islamic nation."

written by Q. William Bacon, 25 November 2010

Watchmen's Rorschach Loses Facebook Account

The reason given was "Lack of Face".

written by Q. William Bacon, 19 November 2010

Bill Gates Wins Lucrative "Richest American" Award

Forbes Magazine's "Richest American" Award, once again goes to Microsoft founder William Gates III. As is tradition, he will be presented with a gold medal, a diploma, and a $100 million prize.

written by Q. William Bacon, 19 November 2010

Donald Trump's Castleboat Capsizes Again

KEY WEST, Florida - "Anyone can own a houseboat," says billionaire Donald Trump. "I'm not just anyone. I own a castleboat. In fact, a replica of Bavaria's famed Neuschwanstein Castle, as a boat."

written by Q. William Bacon, 19 November 2010

Myers-Briggs Test Confirms that Local Man is an Asshole

"The Myers-Briggs is based on a theoretical model of personality that has not been scientifically validated, so we should take their conclusions with a grain of salt," said the asshole.

written by Q. William Bacon, 19 November 2010

eHarmony.com Matches Masturbator with Self

"I don't know how the technology works, but eHarmony really understands me," says masturbator.

written by Q. William Bacon, 19 November 2010

Bush Claims Iran Has Biological WMD Made From Poisonous Fungus

The former president recommended quick action against Iran, saying, "We cannot wait for the final proof, the smoking gun. It could come in the form of a mushroom."

written by Q. William Bacon, 15 November 2010

Dick Cheney to join Bush on book tour

Former president George Bush will be personally signing copies of his memoir, "Decision Points". Former VP Dick Cheney will be personally crossing out the passages that threaten national security.

written by Q. William Bacon, 13 November 2010

Every Object In Hollywood to Get Silicone Implants

Fearing a future of 3D movies and tv shows, every prop, costume, set, and background in Hollywood thinks it needs its surface depth surgically enhanced if it wants to keep working.

written by Q. William Bacon, 09 November 2010


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