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Dick Cheney Reveals True Form, Causing Mass Hysteria

Funny story: Dick Cheney Reveals True Form, Causing Mass Hysteria

Washington, DC (AP) - The screams of a thousand minds cracking at once into depths of madness unimaginable within this universe were heard on the streets of the US Capitol as former Vice President Dick Cheney inadvertently lowered his human shell, re...

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Global Warming Goes on Vegas Crime Spree, Resurfaces as Climate Change

Funny story: Global Warming Goes on Vegas Crime Spree, Resurfaces as Climate Change

Las Vegas, NV - Scientists' fears of Global Warming were vindicated as it began a vicious crime spree on the Las Vegas strip on Wednesday, indulging in criminal acts ranging from vandalism (urinating in the fountain pool of the Bellagio) to strongarm...

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Bush Invites Queen Elizabeth II to be New American Figurehead

Funny story: Bush Invites Queen Elizabeth II to be New American Figurehead

Washington, DC (AP) - President George W. Bush of the USA, his popularity flagging, has reached out across the pond seeking someone, anyone, to take some of the heat that has resulted from his foreign policy off of his back. To that end, he has exte...

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Fred Thompson Gets Plastic Surgery to Look Like Ron Paul, Doesn't Fool Anyone

Funny story: Fred Thompson Gets Plastic Surgery to Look Like Ron Paul, Doesn't Fool Anyone

Washington, DC (AP) - Presidential candidate and talented block of wood Fred Thompson stunned his ten followers Thursday when he went under the knife of local plastic surgeon Red Torrence in an effort to make himself physically, if not ideologically,...

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New Executive Order Adds Thumbscrews to Bush's Torture Toolbox

Funny story: New Executive Order Adds Thumbscrews to Bush's Torture Toolbox

Washinton, DC (AP) - In a monumental signing statement today, President Bush authorized the use of thumbscrews during "enhanced interrogations" by CIA and other US agents.

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The Spoof! as Reliable as Mainstream Media, Study Finds

Funny story: The Spoof! as Reliable as Mainstream Media, Study Finds

Planet Earth (AP) - A study conducted by the League of Informed Gentlemen has determined that reading articles and stories on satire website The Spoof! is nearly as or more informative than most mainstream media reporting.

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O'Reilly Contract Promises Wardrobe Provided by Indian Slave Children

Funny story: O'Reilly Contract Promises Wardrobe Provided by Indian Slave Children

New York, NY (AP) - Intense negotiations over the contract renewal of Fox News anchor Bill O'Reilly wrapped up today after O'Reilly was granted the request that had held up the negotiations; that his wardrobe be exclusively produced by Indian...

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International Peace Rally Broken up by CIA, Neo-Hippie Detainees Taken

Funny story: International Peace Rally Broken up by CIA, Neo-Hippie Detainees Taken

Tirana, Albania - Albanian spectators cheered as a small rally of 100 peace-loving American hippies were ruthlessly apprehended by black-clad paramilitary forces thought to be under the command of the CIA. Albania, known for its unbending support of...

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US Congress Appalled at Two Day Workweek

Funny story: US Congress Appalled at Two Day Workweek

WASHINGTON, DC - A handful of delicate Senators and Representatives collapsed on Thursday as they entered the grueling final hours of yet another two day workweek, underlining the very important issue of Representative Exhaustion (Repex), caused by t...

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Scientists Discovering Cure for Stupidity Find None Who Wants It

Funny story: Scientists Discovering Cure for Stupidity Find None Who Wants It

Binghamton, NY - Binghamton University researchers have discovered a permanent cure for stupidity, which guarantees its users a thirty to fifty point IQ boost. Unfortunately, they have found little market for their new miracle drug, as most people p...

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Aide Sent to Gitmo After Interrupting Bush's "Cartoon Hour"

Funny story: Aide Sent to Gitmo After Interrupting Bush's "Cartoon Hour"

WASHINGTON. DC - Michael Chekof, a former aide to President George W. Bush, was recently shipped off to the infamous detention center in Guantanamo Bay, Cuba, after having the misfortune of walking in on the President while he was deep in the middle...

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Cheney Seeks Ghoulish, Sorcerous Powers

Funny story: Cheney Seeks Ghoulish, Sorcerous Powers

AP - Washington, DC, USA - Vice President Dick Cheney was reported to be deep in the bowels of his Unterfuhrerbunker in recent days chanting over a bubbling cauldron filled with the blood of a hundred defenseless woodland creatures, the brai...

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All We Need is War

(The following document was discovered at the headquarters of Halliburton, recently relocated to Saudi Arabia)...

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Study Finds That 14 Year-Olds Suck at Poetry

Funny story: Study Finds That 14 Year-Olds Suck at Poetry

Cambridge, MA - A panel of 14 different experts in literature and poetry concluded a months-long study into the poetic abilities of the average fourteen year-old. Their findings were nothing if not disheartening.

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Rosie O'Donnel Eats Three Silverback Gorillas

Funny story: Rosie O'Donnel Eats Three Silverback Gorillas

Hollywood, CA - Television star and and opinionated uber-lesbian Rosie O'Donnel wowed fans as she greedily consumed three male silverback gorillas to protest something or another, though no one could figure out exactly what through the hail of bl...

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Kim Jong Il Voted "Sexiest Man Alive" By North Koreans

Funny story: Kim Jong Il Voted "Sexiest Man Alive" By North Koreans

Pyongyang, North Korea - In an entirely unsurprising vote on Monday, the North Korean people showed their unwavering support for President Kim Jong Il as they unanimously voted him "Sexiest Man Alive" in state-sponsored elections.

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Calling Bikers "Sissies" Quick Way to Get Killed, Study Finds

Funny story: Calling Bikers "Sissies" Quick Way to Get Killed, Study Finds

Boston, MA - A ten-minute long Harvard study concluded yesterday that calling bikers "sissies" was a quick way to get oneself murdered.

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Bush Denounces Torture After Pelosi Brunch

Funny story: Bush Denounces Torture After Pelosi Brunch

Washington, DC - President Bush publicly denounced torture soon after wrapping up a political brunch with House Speaker Nancy Pelosi which involved heavy negotiations regarding a number of pending bills, including the controversial "No Child Lef...

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