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Funny story: Retirement-eligible committee of mainly old geezers fondly remembering their glory days yield lower-than-expected College Football Playoff® T.V. ratings

Retirement-eligible committee of mainly old geezers fondly remembering their glory days yield lower-than-expected College Football Playoff® T.V. ratings

(The Unassociated Press) - The interested T.V. audience for the College Football Playoff ®™ dropped significantly from last season, due to a systemic failure by executives to recognize good entertainment value. Data analysis suggests that the win...

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Funny story: Yuri Gagarin's Death a Hoax (sort of)

Yuri Gagarin's Death a Hoax (sort of)

An unnamed, albeit reliable, source has confirmed that the remains of former Soviet extraterrestrial orbiter, Yuri Gagarin, were recovered in the South Pacific commingled with trace amounts of Chinese space junk that recently returned to planet Earth...

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Funny story: Study Finds That Germs Are A Haven For Other Germs

Study Finds That Germs Are A Haven For Other Germs

(Health Anxiety Quarterly) - The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention recently announced a chilling new finding, revealing that germs themselves are some of the dirtiest organisms on our planet. Lead [pronounced leed] researcher, Dr. Hai Po-...

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Funny story: "Son of N!xau" Being Groomed for 'The Gods Must Be Crazy (Part VI)'

"Son of N!xau" Being Groomed for 'The Gods Must Be Crazy (Part VI)'

(Entertainment Weakly, Hollywood) - Eight years after his poor dad's death, Z!xau, son of Namibian bush-farmer-turned-actor-turned-bush-farmer, N!xau, has shown interest in picking up where his late father left off. Our reporter in the bush submit...

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Funny story: Brad Pitt Attempts to Break the "Sixth Wall"

Brad Pitt Attempts to Break the "Sixth Wall"

The traditional view of theater is that three walls surround the actors (or "players" as they are sometimes called) while an invisible "fourth wall" separates the characters from the audience. There is also the notion of a "fifth wall" that repres...

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Funny story: TheSpoof.com Scribe Has No Idea How Points System Works

TheSpoof.com Scribe Has No Idea How Points System Works

Irregular TheSpoof.com donor, CrepeSalivator, has confessed that he has "absolutely no clue" how the POINTS SYSTEM works on the website. "Somehow I managed to get approximately two-million points during a three-year stretch when I was distracted.

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Funny story: Boehner, Bachmann, Huckabee, and King Protest List of "Haters"

Boehner, Bachmann, Huckabee, and King Protest List of "Haters"

(Hate Group Monthly) - Several House Republicans are outraged that the Southern Poverty Law Center (SPLC) has added four groups to a nationwide database of colored pins on the map. This brings the number of hate groups in the U.S. even closer to t...

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Funny story: 'Tubby' Mariah Carey Sings in Public for President Obama

'Tubby' Mariah Carey Sings in Public for President Obama

(District of Columbia) - This year's Christmas in Washington television special featured none other than Mariah Carey dressed up as a wrapped-in-red box-with-bow for the President and First Family. Ms. Carey jetted in for the event immediately aft...

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Funny story: Harry Reid's Text to Lady Gaga Regarding "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" Repeal Causes Firestorm of Controversy

Harry Reid's Text to Lady Gaga Regarding "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" Repeal Causes Firestorm of Controversy

(US and A) - After the Senate voted to repeal the longstanding "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" policy, Senator Harry Reid (Democrat, Nevada) quickly tweeted the following message just past noon on Saturday: @LadyGaga ~ We did it! #DADT is a thing of the...

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Funny story: Sarah Palin and John Boehner Accuse Trio (Santa Claus/Julian Assange/Barack Obama) of Planning a Sex Attack on Parliament on Christmas Eve Day; WikiLeaks, X Factor, Football to be Unaffected

Sarah Palin and John Boehner Accuse Trio (Santa Claus/Julian Assange/Barack Obama) of Planning a Sex Attack on Parliament on Christmas Eve Day; WikiLeaks, X Factor, Football to be Unaffected

Superfriends Sarah Palin and John Boehner believe they have figured out the "what", the "who", and the "when" -- but the "where" and the "how" remain sketchy. Palin: "I have a source of good intelligence who tells me that those three (Santa Claus,...

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Funny story: Congress Debates Boehner's Orange Penis

Congress Debates Boehner's Orange Penis

(Inside-the-Beltway, District of Columbia) - Following a recent revelation by "Weeper of the House" John Boehner that his penis is, in fact, orange like the rest of him, both the upper house and the lower house of Congress have launched hearings on t...

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Funny story: Barely-Used Fitness Equipment, ...Barely-Used Fitness Equipment, ...Get Your Barely-Used Fitness Equipment Here!

Barely-Used Fitness Equipment, ...Barely-Used Fitness Equipment, ...Get Your Barely-Used Fitness Equipment Here!

(Associated Benchpress) - It's that time of year again when people buy for themselves and each other all sorts of home fitness gadgets to be used for getting in shape throughout the New Year. The big problem is that there is currently too much raw material tied up in existing home gym equipment that ultimately remains dormant. As a result, manufacturers are asking the public to turn in their o...

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Funny story: TheSpoof.com Scribe Shocked to Learn 1937 Film "Wee Willie Winkie" Features Shirley Temple and has Nothing to do with the Eponymous Scottish Nursery Rhyme

TheSpoof.com Scribe Shocked to Learn 1937 Film "Wee Willie Winkie" Features Shirley Temple and has Nothing to do with the Eponymous Scottish Nursery Rhyme

Neighbors of an irregular TheSpoof.com contributor abruptly saw their world of peace and quiet come to an end this morning with staccato shouting: "What the feck? Shirley Temple as Wee Willie Winkie? And it takes place in Colonial India? You ha...

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Funny story: "Weeper of the House" John Boehner Reveals His Prick Is Also Orange

"Weeper of the House" John Boehner Reveals His Prick Is Also Orange

(District of Columbia) - In an attempt to show that he does not merely masquerade as a person "of color", a tearful John Boehner revealed to 60.5 Minutes that he does in fact have an orange penis as well. "I used to get so inspired by Oprah Winfre...

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Funny story: "Sarah Palin's Mighty Frozen Alaskan Vagina" Sweeping the Nation

"Sarah Palin's Mighty Frozen Alaskan Vagina" Sweeping the Nation

(US & A) - The reality-TV miniseries, Sarah Palin's Mighty Frozen Alaskan Vagina, has only been airing on The loosely-named Learning Channel for five episodes. But it is setting records in viewership, with more than 1 out of every 100 Americans...

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Funny story: Former Presidential Contender Fred Thompson Is Turning Into a 'Thompson Raisin'

Former Presidential Contender Fred Thompson Is Turning Into a 'Thompson Raisin'

Actor and conservative former Tennessee senator, Fred Thompson, is shriveling up and turning into a raisin, according to his physician. "To be fair, we are not one-hundred percent certain if he is turning into a raisin or a craisin -- the cranberr...

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Funny story: Cat Drinking Behavior Is Just a Big Show by Cats

Cat Drinking Behavior Is Just a Big Show by Cats

(Boston, Massachusetts) - A recent study by four MIT scientists that lasted for three-and-a-half years has now been shown to be a hoax. "We assumed the cats had no idea we were watching them while they were drinking," said project engineer Broman...

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