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Funny story: Heston Blooming-Tal Makes A Meal Of It

Heston Blooming-Tal Makes A Meal Of It

This year, 2012, is the Queen's Diamond Jubilee year. We asked famous bonkers celebrity chef Heston Blooming-Tal to come up with a recipe to celebrate her Queening anniversary, just like whoever it was who came up with Coronation Chicken in 1952. First Heston considered swan, but the legal department made it clear that there would be complications. Then he thought about lion, and again had to b...

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Funny story: The day the music died

The day the music died

There was an international outpouring of sympathy at the weekend for the death of Whitney Houston. But another less celebrated musician died on the same day, whose passing has barely been mentioned in the newspapers. Johnny "John" Johnson had a musical career spanning five decades. A few weeks ago, TheSpoof were lucky enough to interview him for the last time, barring a now-unlikely comeback. T...

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Funny story: Creationist archaeologists discover proof of God

Creationist archaeologists discover proof of God

In the Nevada desert, a group of archaeologists have made an astonishing discovery which appears to provide evidence for creationism. In a large dig site, the bones of ten dinosaurs have been discovered wearing crucifixes. Chief digger and creatio...

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Funny story: Brian Blessed in the running to be new England manager

Brian Blessed in the running to be new England manager

After the sudden resignation of Fabio Capello, the English Football Association are casting the net very wide indeed to search for the next England manager. They have said they would prefer the next coach to be English, but he doesn't necessarily nee...

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Funny story: Media outrage at "disgraceful" Brits abroad

Media outrage at "disgraceful" Brits abroad

There has been a media frenzy about a group of Brits who travelled abroad and behaved disgracefully last week. The Daily Mail described them as "an embarrassment to the whole country". The Guardian called them "a sad inditement [sic] of our youth". T...

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Funny story: Barry would like to be your friend

Barry would like to be your friend

You have 1 new friend request from Barry. You have 1 new message from Barry, sent 1 Feb 18:35. hello mate its me barry. remember we was at school together. remember that one time we flushed your trousers down the toilet that was facking hilarious. then that other time you and biffer got into a fight and he beat the crap out of you. good times anyways im in town and i need somewhere to crash...

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Funny story: Prime Minister's Questions board game released

Prime Minister's Questions board game released

Have you ever watched Prime Minister's Questions and thought "I'd love to do that"? Well now you can, with the official Prime Minister's Questions board game. It is a game for three players. One player takes the part of the Leader of the Opposition, one plays the Prime Minister and the third player is the Speaker of the House. The game is simple. The Leader of the Opposition thinks up a...

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Funny story: BBC imports another Scandinavian "slow paced" drama

BBC imports another Scandinavian "slow paced" drama

Following the success of Danish drama "Snegl Løb" (Snail Race) and Danish tragedy "Se Mug Vokse" (Watching Mould Grow), the BBC has imported another Scandinavia drama to show on its TV channel for pretentious snobs, BBC4. Entitled "Maling Tørker"...

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Funny story: The World in 2012

The World in 2012

What will the world be like in 2012? Now we have an idea, but in the past people could only wonder. In 1912, a group of leading scientists wrote a book about their predictions for the world 100 years into the future. Their conjectures cover everyday life, global politics, society and new inventions that may exist. The book, entitled "The World in 2012", was lost long ago but has recently been redi...

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Funny story: Pope to star in his own sitcom

Pope to star in his own sitcom

The Vatican has announced that Pope Benedict XVI will star in his own television sitcom, to be based on the Pope's everyday life. The Pope will write the script, as he is a keen comedy writer. The Pope has been doing standup comedy for a few years...

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Funny story: A tribute to 19th century explorer Sir Dr Wilbert Vagina-Crumpington

A tribute to 19th century explorer Sir Dr Wilbert Vagina-Crumpington

The name Sir Dr Wilbert Vagina-Crumpington is little heard these days, and that is a great shame, for he was one of the greatest explorers of pre-Victorian Britain. He discovered the bottom of the Nile, and he invented Madagascar. He is responsible for recording for the first time countless tribes around the world, most of which he named after himself. He is also responsible for discovering an...

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Funny story: Pan-European Television Channel to be Launched

Pan-European Television Channel to be Launched

A Europe-wide TV channel is to be launched next week, featuring the very best in European interest programming. The channel, to be called EURO-TV, will do its best to avoid the problems encountered by similar now-defunct channels. Those problems were largely caused by the multilingual nature of Europe. EURO-TV will try to avoid these by not broadcasting any speech. Entertainment will be provid...

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Funny story: Government introduces bonus seizure law

Government introduces bonus seizure law

After a clamour of popular protest, the UK government has rushed through new legislation which allows them to seize any bonuses that are deemed too high. A committee of "public interest specialists" will meet every month to discuss who should have...

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Funny story: "The Sound of Plumbing" reaches number one

"The Sound of Plumbing" reaches number one

An unusual song called "Boiler Change" has reached the top of the UK pop charts, out-selling by two to one its nearest rival "Love a love of lovely love" by a talent show reject. "Boiler Change" is a unique track, consisting of an actual real life...

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Funny story: A Bad Romance In Every Way

A Bad Romance In Every Way

Their eyes met across the busy dancefloor. Unlikely though it was, both of their glass eyes had fallen out at the same time, rolled across the ground - avoiding dozens of dancing feet - and bumped into each other. Theobald and Griselda approached each other, put their eyes back in and began an awkward conversation. He didn't normally enjoy yakking. He had caught a large one the previous year bu...

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Funny story: How The Moon Landings Were Faked

How The Moon Landings Were Faked

Many a curious Earthling has gazed up at the Moon at night and pondered, "just how did the American government manage to fake those landings on the Moon?". As a recent book by "astronaut" Buzz Aldrin reveals, there were considerable obstacles to overcome. But for those of you of a weak disposition, prepare to be shocked. This conspiracy is even bigger than you could have imagined. "The main pro...

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Funny story: "A History Of The Intertelnet", written in 1874 by Sir Charles Cockface

"A History Of The Intertelnet", written in 1874 by Sir Charles Cockface

The world's interconnected telegraph network, also known as the intertelnet, has been running for a little over forty years now, sending Morse code messages around the civilised world. It was in 1832 that the first electrical telegrammatic message was sent from Dorking to Effingham by Lady Spongebob Telegraph, wife of the inventor Lord Jethro Telegraph. Famously, the message was a whimsical descri...

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