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Funny story: US Outsources Torture, American Jobs

US Outsources Torture, American Jobs

Strasbourg, France -- The Council of Europe announced today that there is strong evidence that the US has "outsourced" torture to some eastern European sites, most likely to take advantage of cost savings and tax breaks in low-wage c...

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Funny story: Pilots Fly Better Drunk, Study Shows

Pilots Fly Better Drunk, Study Shows

Miami, FL - A study released this week by the National Institutes of Health reveals that pilots actually do a better job when drinking on the job or immediately before going to work. The study, due to be published in this month's issue of

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Funny story: Bring Me a 5-Bladed Razor, Lest I Perish

Bring Me a 5-Bladed Razor, Lest I Perish

In most areas of life, I count myself a lucky man. I have a good job, a nice family, a peaceful home and, for the time being, no woman around to bother me. Each year when holidays come around and people start peppering me with questions about what I want, I’m usually forced to admit that I have just about every creature comfort that a man can buy. Electronics, books, aged scotch in a fine cut c...

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Funny story: Bush Takes Blame for Government's Sluggishness in Taking Blame

Bush Takes Blame for Government's Sluggishness in Taking Blame

Washington, DC - President Bush announced Wednesday that he was fully prepared to accept responsibility for the federal government's foot dragging in owning up to its own apathetic lethargy in the wake of hurricane Katrina.

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Funny story: Armstrong Can Have It, Tour Riders Say

Armstrong Can Have It, Tour Riders Say

-- Pau, FRANCE-- "I quit." It's not something one is used to hearing from professional athletes. For the men and women who dedicate themselves to sport, training day in and day out to be the very best, competition is all there is. The greate...

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Funny story: Runaway Bride Kidnapped (again), Community Apathetic

Runaway Bride Kidnapped (again), Community Apathetic

Duluth, GA - Jennifer Wilbanks, the woman who faked her own kidnapping in April to avoid her wedding, has disappeared from her suburban Atlanta home just one day before she was scheduled to appear in court.

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Funny story: Deep Throat Comes Forward, Laments Pseudonym

Deep Throat Comes Forward, Laments Pseudonym

Former FBI Deputy Director Mark Felt revealed to a stunned world Tuesday that he was in fact "Deep Throat," the infamous informant who played a crucial role in bringing down the Nixon administration in 1974 in the wake of the Watergate scandal. Felt...

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Funny story: L.A. Mayor Descendant of Zorro

L.A. Mayor Descendant of Zorro

The office of Antonio Villaraigosa, newly elected mayor of Los Angeles, and first Latino mayor in 133 years, announced today that he is, in fact, a descendant of the legendary figure Zorro, a hero who fought for the rights of disenfranchised peasants...

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