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Funny story: Obama's $787 Billion Economic Stimulus To Be Wired To Nigerian Accounts

Obama's $787 Billion Economic Stimulus To Be Wired To Nigerian Accounts

WASHINGTON (FMLIVEWIRE) -- The US Congress approved the $787 billion economic stimulus bill on Friday sought by the Obama administration, with the proviso that the money will first be wired to special Nigerian offshore accounts as recommended by seni...

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Funny story: Israel Develops "Soylent Brown" Matzoh Crackers

Israel Develops "Soylent Brown" Matzoh Crackers

JERUSALEM (FMLiveWire) -- Innovative Israeli industry has produced a new kosher food product: "Soylent Brown" Matzoh crackers in cooperation with the nation's military. "These new crackers are tasty and high in protein," said Benjamin Netanyahu,...

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Funny story: Satan Endorses Gaza Bombing, Invasion

Satan Endorses Gaza Bombing, Invasion

JERUSALEM (FMLiveWire) - In a surprise appearance, Satan materialized in the Knesset here on Monday and endorsed the Israeli bombing and invasion of Gaza, to thunderous applause from legislators. "This genocide is great stuff," chortled Satan. "Yo...

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Funny story: Defiant Illinois Governor Sells Obama's Senate Seat for $10 million

Defiant Illinois Governor Sells Obama's Senate Seat for $10 million

CHICAGO (FMLiveWire) - A defiant Governor Rod Blagojevich on Tuesday sold Barack Obama's Senate seat for $10 million. He said the sale has no connection to the charges filed against him during his arrest in December. "I need that $10 million bu...

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Funny story: NORAD Tracking Santa Threat

NORAD Tracking Santa Threat

COLORADO SPRINGS (FMLiveWire) - Who says the Santa Claus communist threat doesn't exist? The military personnel here at NORAD charged with being the eyes in the sky are believers and are acting like the threat is very real. The North American...

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Funny story: Orders Pour In For Bush Attack Shoes

Orders Pour In For Bush Attack Shoes

WASHINGTON (FMLive Wire) -- The shoe hurled at President George W. Bush has sent sales soaring for the Turkish shoe maker as orders pour in from Iraq, the USA, Congress, Iran, Europe and other developing and developed nations. The gray-brown, th...

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Funny story: Marijuana Has Big Medical Benefits and Counters Deadly Effects of Aspartame

Marijuana Has Big Medical Benefits and Counters Deadly Effects of Aspartame

WASHINGTON (FMLiveWire) - A food and drug watchdog announced Tuesday that its new scientific studies supported the medical and recreational use of marijuana "by rats and other mammal creatures." Chief Ralph Roachman made the startling announcement...

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Funny story: General Motors To Begin Making Toy Cars

General Motors To Begin Making Toy Cars

DETROIT (FMLiveWire)- The failure on Thursday of a congressional rescue package for the U.S. auto industry has made General Motors Corp. (GM) decide to shift production to toy cars. GM said it was "disappointed" by the Senate's rejection of $14 bi...

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Funny story: Obama To Legalize Marijuana

Obama To Legalize Marijuana

WASHINGTON (FMLiveWire) - President-elect Barack Obama announced on Thursday that his administration will quickly legalize marijuana. "I am preparing to end the costly and pointless federal raids on marijuana users," said Obama between drags from...

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Funny story: FDA and US Agriculture Dept. Approve Cola as Pesticides

FDA and US Agriculture Dept. Approve Cola as Pesticides

WASHINGTON (FMLiveWire) - The US Food and Drug Administration and the Department of Agriculture have jointly approved the use of cola as pesticides in farming and general pest control both outdoors and indoors. The two government organizations had...

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Funny story: Pentagon Expanding Number of Aliens Recruited: Ranks to Include More Wookies, Klingons, Droids

Pentagon Expanding Number of Aliens Recruited: Ranks to Include More Wookies, Klingons, Droids

WASHINGTON (FMLiveWire) -- The Pentagon has issued a directive to expand the number of aliens it recruits into the military in yet another effort to make up for chronic shortages of warriors, doctors, and linguists available for wartime duty. The...

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Funny story: Obama Saves Auto Industry, to Build "Obamawagens"

Obama Saves Auto Industry, to Build "Obamawagens"

WASHINGTON (FMLiveWire) -- President-elect Barack Obama has unveiled his plan to save the ailing US auto industry by nationalizing the auto sector and making a single car model, to be known as the "Obamawagen." Modeled on the popular beetle-shaped...

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Funny story: Obama Blames "Fat Cat Wall Street Honkies" For Global Financial Crisis

Obama Blames "Fat Cat Wall Street Honkies" For Global Financial Crisis

DOHA (FMLiveWire) - US President-elect Barack Obama has blamed "fat cat honkies on Wall Street" for the global financial crisis, saying other countries are being dragged in to help resolve Western problems. "Those rich Wall Street crackers are pus...

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Funny story: FDA Finds Fast Food, MSG and Aspartame Cause Alzheimer's

FDA Finds Fast Food, MSG and Aspartame Cause Alzheimer's

WASHINGTON (FMLiveWire) -- People fed junk food which included MSG and Aspartame for nine months developed the abnormal brain tangles typical of Alzheimer's disease, just released FDA research indicated on Friday. The findings show how the typical...

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Funny story: Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt Adopt Michael Jackson

Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt Adopt Michael Jackson

HOLLYWOOD (FMLiveWire) - Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie have expanded their family by adopting Michael Jackson. Jackson thus becomes the Hollywood couple's seventh child. Recent tabloid articles report that the radical Jackson adoption has saved...

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Funny story: Michael Jackson, Miley Cyrus, Paris Hilton and Madonna Convert to Islam

Michael Jackson, Miley Cyrus, Paris Hilton and Madonna Convert to Islam

MECCA (FMLiveWire) - In a moving ceremony here on Friday, Michael Jackson, Miley Cyrus, Paris Hilton and Madonna converted to Islam, All wore the abaya, the traditional Arab women's veil, making it difficult to tell them apart. Jackson, 50, had be...

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Funny story: George Bush Looks Forward to "A Nice Quiet Padded Cell" When He Leaves the White House

George Bush Looks Forward to "A Nice Quiet Padded Cell" When He Leaves the White House

WASHINGTON (FMLiveWire) -- President George W. Bush says he looks forward to "a nice quiet padded cell" when he leaves the White House shortly to make way for Barack Obama. "Imagine having peace and quiet for a change, regular medications and supe...

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