The winner of the Westminster dog show has been stripped of his title due to a long-standing relationship with a same-sex lover. The American Kennel Club announced that Jimmy, an English springer spaniel, would heave to return his trophy and give up...
After several years of denial, America's rich are finally admitting they are getting richer.
Terrorism concerns have prompted President Bush to sign an emergency executive order to arrest and detain all three million of the nation's lite-brite toys. Lite-Brites displaying smartass cartoon characters terrorized Boston and brought the cit...
Super Bowl XLI will be a milestone in Super Bowl history. Will the game be more entertaining than the commercials? Unlikely. Rather, this will be the last year the NFL will designate the game with those confusing Roman numerals.
Although the vast majority of Americans would like to return President Bush and get their money back, they are hampered by the lack of a receipt. The latest Newsweek poll shows a paltry 30% of Americans believe Bush is doing a good job as President.
Oprah Winfrey announced today that the Chicago suburban Yellow Pages is her next book club pick. This is her first book club selection since James Frey's controversial "A Million Little Pieces" last year. Frey's book was presented...
American kids are spending so much time exercising that they are starting to lose their lead as the best video gamers in the world. This has profound economic and national security implications.
For the last three years the Petersons of Monmouth, New Jersey have had the proud distinction of being the only non-dysfunctional family in America. With a blissful marriage, well-adjusted kids, and no feuds in sight, they were the envy of their nei...
The handful of Americans who managed to stay awake through President Bush's State of the Union address noted there was nothing especially noteworthy. Listening to the speech backwards, however, reveals Bush apparently saying "Gore was right...
In an amazing feat of recursive neurophysiology, scientists have found the specific area of the brain used by humans to determine what specific areas of the brain are used for.
Partying around town without underwear is not the only thing Britney Spears will do to get attention. Britney is angry that actress Lindsay Lohan has knocked her off the headlines with drunken escapades which were then followed by checking into a sw...
Hollywood announced today that their current movie-ratings system would be scrapped and replaced with a "What would Jesus watch?" rating structure. Critics of the current system complain it is too secretive, inconsistent, and no longer use...
Donald Trump likes to be number one in all things, and he can add another to his collection with Forbes magazine putting him on top of their "Most Annoying Billionaire" list. With over 400 Americans having a net worth of least a billion do...
Hillary Clinton, who just formally announced that she is running for President in 2008, appears to be leading all other contenders in the all-important area of platitude raising.
Are you concerned that your colleagues may catch on to your rampant incompetence? Always paying for drinks and giving your boss foot massages will only work for so long. Using proper email etiquette is an effective way to fool coworkers into overlooking your obvious lack of skills, motivation, and proper grooming. Here are some email etiquette hints.
Online dating site Match.com was hit by hackers who scrambled the relationship logic in order to make thousands of matches that are doomed to failure. Match.com is the world's largest online dating site, and prides itself on being able to find l...
Executives and politicians forced to resign their positions typically say they were motivated by the need to "spend more time with my family". This sounds better in press releases than "I'm about to be indicted" or "they...
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