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Funny story: Why Gun Companies Love Obama

Why Gun Companies Love Obama

It's hard to watch the news for five minutes without hearing "The government / police / aliens / Liberals / 'Mickey Mouse' Club are on their way to your house right F*ing now to take your guns!" The internet is a buzzing with the news that New York is creating harsh anti-gun regulations. The US Congress has held hearings where they invited industry experts to tell them facts and stories while...

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Funny story: Obama is no Longer Interesting Enough for Fox News

Obama is no Longer Interesting Enough for Fox News

When the State of the Union rebuttal is drowned out by the speaker touching his face and drinking water it's time to admit, "Talking about liberals is just boring." No one is freaking out enough to watch 24 hour news coverage about fixing bridges,...

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Funny story: Can Chemicals in Juice Boxes Make Your Kids Gay?

Can Chemicals in Juice Boxes Make Your Kids Gay?

Everyone knows that I'm an extreme conservative. I'm the kind of hard stomping guy usually depicted in Super Bowl Truck commercials. I drive my Ford F350 from my house in the suburbs to my high impact job as an Accountant downtown. Today's hero of Freedom is conservative Radio sensation Alex Jones. Alex is the kind of hard hitting conservative who wanted to deport suspected Redcoat Piers Mor...

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Funny story: Tennessee To Welfare Kids: Bad Grades = No Food

Tennessee To Welfare Kids: Bad Grades = No Food

Everyone knows that I'm an extreme conservative. I'm the kind of conservative who listens to Ronald Reagan's speeches while watching Fox News at the gun range. Today's hero of freedom is Tennessee's State Congressman Stacey Campfield. Stacey is the kind of man (you read that right! Totally a dude named Stacey) who has big ideas. One of his first big ideas was that AIDS in only a gay thing.

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Funny story: Congress's No Budget No Pay Till…Whenever…

Congress's No Budget No Pay Till…Whenever…

Everyone knows that I'm an extreme conservative. I'm the kind of conservative who seeks to lower taxes, while at the same time describing anyone who is not paying taxes as moochers. Today's heroes of freedom are the US Congress. While passing the debt limit bill they passed the No Budget No Pay Act of 2013 which states that if either the House of Representative or the Senate fails to pass a b...

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Funny story: GOP Rep Steve Stockman's Impeachment Crusade of One

GOP Rep Steve Stockman's Impeachment Crusade of One

Everyone knows that I'm an extreme conservative. I'm 100% against the metric system. This is why I eat my sandwiches by the foot, while ordering my drinks by the liter. Today's hero of freedom is Representative Steve Stockman. Rep Stockman is the kind of man who is not afraid to threaten to impeach Obama if he continues with his executive orders. He is willing to stand up to tyranny despite...

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Funny story: The Tea Party Strikes Back

The Tea Party Strikes Back

Everyone knows that I'm an extreme conservative. I'm a hardcore Republican warrior who will fight for limited government, deregulation, personal responsibility and a balanced budget. As long as we don't have to cut our centralized military that costs more than the next four countries combined. Today's hero of freedom is Dustin Stockton a spokesperson for TheTeaParty.net. Dustin is the kind o...

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Funny story: King Obama? Rand Paul Doesn't Think So.

King Obama? Rand Paul Doesn't Think So.

Everyone knows that I'm an extreme conservative. I'm the type of Conservative who has God sanctioned missionary style sex with my wife while thinking about Ronald Reagan. Today's hero of Freedom is Kentucky Senator Rand Paul. Rand is the son o...

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