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New York City Ring of Steel Indicative Of Terrorism Cells Rampant In Midtown

The requests that have been put forward by the NY City Police Chief for government grants to cover at least some of the 91 million that is needed to reinforce the city's Ring of Steel in Midtown, has been backed up by claims that the surveillance cam...

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Airport Administrators That Implemented Nude X-Ray Machine Actually Porn Addicts

Funny story: Airport Administrators That Implemented Nude X-Ray Machine Actually Porn Addicts

In the wake of the news that airports across the country will now be using machines that take nude photographs of passengers, x rays of a person's insides, and body cavity searches that are video taped, it has now been discovered that the administrat...

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Kate Gosselin Is Planning More Kids, Jon Is Furious

Kate Gosselin has announced that she is trying to get pregnant. Again. "I just want one more," she told reporters. When asked how she would feel if she found out it was more than just one, again, she said, "that's okay, I have plenty of love to...

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President Declares Martial Law Due To Peaceful Protests Becoming Too Violent

The President of the United States has declared today that, due to the peaceful protests going on around the country being way too violent for the public's safety, there will now be Martial Law, a State of War, and a State of Emergency due to Disaste...

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Janet Jackson is actually Michael Jackson In Disguise

A shocking discovery was made today. Janet Jackson is actually Michael Jackson in disguise. One fan wrote in their diary, "I always wondered why it was you never saw the two of them together. And Janet's face looked funny after Michael got his sur...

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Pat Robertson Tells Christians "Don't Be Rebellious"

Reporter: "Do you think that Christians should get involved in the protests going on down on Wall Street?" Pat Robertson: "In my opinion, these protester down there on Wall Street are just plain rebellious. Christians should have nothing to do with anything like that. It'll just give us all a bad reputation." Reporter: "So you are saying that you don't think that Jesus would have had anythin...

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NYPD declares huge win over OWS

Reporter: "So, it has been a harrowing season for you guys, hasn't it? I mean, you guys have been out there every time, putting everything you have into taking the OWS players down. To what do you chalk your current win status up to, so far?" NYPD Representative: "Well, first of all, we have a player that so far has not had a chance to get in the game. But, now, the DA has been able to attempt...

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The New Blackout Law Will Extend to China, Expert Says

We recently spoke with an expert about the new Blackout Law that is being introduced in Congress. The new law is aimed at making sure that United States citizens can no longer own, go to, or even remotely talk about, websites that support online p...

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Surgeon General Demands Disclosure From Tobacco Companies

Funny story: Surgeon General Demands Disclosure From Tobacco Companies

The Surgeon General has demanded that tobacco companies must now place all of the ingredients that are put in cigarettes onto the individual boxes that the cigarettes come in. This comes after pressure from the US Firefighters Association, when it...

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Scientists Have Answer To Pole Shift Question

Funny story: Scientists Have Answer To Pole Shift Question

Scientific experts concluded today that, much like how air pollution created by people is the only reason for global warming, (and not that completely bizarre theory about the earth expanding, which has no basis in reality), people are also responsib...

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