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Organic Grocer to Sell "Straight Sanctimony"

Funny story: Organic Grocer to Sell "Straight Sanctimony"

Boulder, CO - Organic grocer Whole Globe Foods has announced a new produce-free product called "Straight Sanctimony" to appeal to its customers who want to feel good about themselves, even though they don't like eating fresh vegetables or fruit.

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Time Magazine names Obama its "Person of the 21st Century"

Following on the announcement that President Barack Obama won the 2009 Nobel Peace Prize, for which he was nominated only 12 days after his inauguration, Time Magazine has proclaimed Mr. Obama to be it's "Person of the 21st Century." The Managin...

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Californian's Idea for Perpetual Motion Snags Nobel Prize

Following on the surprise announcement that President Barack Obama has won the 2009 Nobel Peace Prize for desiring to "strengthen international diplomacy and cooperation between people," the Nobel committee has announced its winner of the 2009 Nobel...

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Fort Worth Couple Obstruct 22 Foot-Wide Warehouse Store Aisle

Fort Worth, TX - A Fort Worth couple shopping at the Stan's Club Cost Containment Warehouse store in west Fort Worth achieved what no couple had ever done before. The two of them, along with two shopping carts, successfully obstructed a 22-foot wide...

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Coffee Giant Rolls Out Instant Coffee, Hostess Pastries

Funny story: Coffee Giant Rolls Out Instant Coffee, Hostess Pastries

Seattle, WA - Bratsucks CEO Henry Schmuck announced this week that the iconic coffee purveyor will be introducing an instant coffee product in all of its stores. Named "Via", the discount-priced instant coffee is a daring new product line for a com...

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NY Times to Sell Publishing Operations

The New York Times Company has announced that it is seeking a buyer for its failing publishing operation. This follows in the footsteps of the news that Time Warner, Inc is considering selling its publishing operations, which include Time Magazine,...

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Seeking Obama's Support, Eastern European Country Renounces U.S. Allegiance

Funny story: Seeking Obama's Support, Eastern European Country Renounces U.S. Allegiance

Slzaczwa, Molvakia - The Prime Minister of Molvakia announced today that he is renouncing his country's allegiance with the United States. Prime Minister Zinaida Szili said it is with great regret that he takes this action, because he has long a...

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G20 Protestor Angered to Find His Car Vandalized

Funny story: G20 Protestor Angered to Find His Car Vandalized

Pittsburgh, PA - A G20 protestor returning to his car from a busy day of protesting capitalism found his car with a smashed window and missing its radio. Troy Kleagle of Portland, Oregon had driven himself and three other activists across the co...

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Breaking news…

Trump Family Publishes List of Places They Will Build New Trump Hotels

Coincidentally, they are all located in countries with no extradition treaty with the U.S.
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