Much like explosive diarrhoea, Brexit is the gift that keeps on giving. It now appears to be infecting the most benign conversations. Every day, domestic drudgery and water-cooler moments are new opportunities for Brexiteers and Remainers to sling mu...
Countdown presenter Rachel Riley, has taken it upon herself to become the self-appointed spokesperson for the Mathematical community. "It's hard to imagine," explains Riley, "but there really are people out there who don't like maths. I call them...
Popular daytime telly favourite, Make Me a Dealer, returns to our screens this week. The show, hosted by amiable host Mart Paulin, pits two aspiring drug dealers against each other. The two contestants, Dwayne Trutter a former football hooligan and D...
At the start of this week's episode, Laird Shergar addressed the remaining candidates from the back of Derek Trotter's van: "It's an unknown fact that 25 Squillion quid is lost each year to the black economy," explained Lady Shagger. "These crimin...
Excitement as the latest series of Celebs Go Dating reaches its climax! The show, where famous 'celebrities' have to use the properties of radioactive isotope Carbon-14 to correctly predict the age of prehistoric artefacts, is entering its final week...
It's Apptober again! The Apprentice has returned for another season and this year the candidates are more hapless than ever. Take IT Consultant Prakash, who has a very unique way of producing wealth. "I ooze wealth from my every pore." Explains Praka...
Not content taking over the Labour party, it appears left-wing activists Momentum have decided to take over the world of coffee. The popular left-wing pressure group launched their new not-for-profit enterprise, 'Corbynista', at this year's party...
Fan forums worldwide have gone into meltdown when it emerged that footage of a new, previously unheard of, Doctor Who monster, had been leaked online. Called the 'Wo-Men', they are in fact a race of Cybermen. Unlike their cold, logical, counterparts...
The loss of Great British Bake Off to rivals Channel 4 was one of the most spectacular fails in the organisation's history. One that still leaves a sour taste in the mouth of BBC bosses. In a desperate attempt to win back viewers and recover its...
One of the BBC's longest running and much loved cookery shows 'Great British Menu' - has been plunged like a pus-covered scalpel - into hot water. The theme of this year's competition, Seventy Years of the NHS has challenged twenty four of the UK's...
Another day another punning newspaper headline about shale gas extraction. The industry has been a godsend for copywriters everywhere. Said one fleet street hack, "the great thing about Fracking is that it's possible to replace the word 'fuck', with...
"I'm the MP for Eastleigh!" "No, I'm the MP for Eastleigh!" - Hollywood star wins historic victory Holywood star, Michael Douglas, has become the surprise winner of the Eastleigh Byelection. Full name, Michael Douglas Thorton, is best known for...
With Operation Yewtree cutting a swathe through the childhood nostalgia of 30 and 40 somethings up and down the land, it may surprise many to learn that creepy 1980s children's entertainer Uncle Jake McRaffles was not a nonce, as many had suspected,...
1980s Children's TV star and sock puppet, Gordon the Gopher, has admitted that he was "shocked" and "appalled" to see his former colleague Phillip Schofield ambush Prime Minister David Cameron on ITV's 'This Morning', this morning. The poorly judg...
Every year the town of Dorking plays host to a very special talent contest - Dorking's Pets Have Got Talent, is a contest to find some of the most talented pets in the Dorking area. Last year the top prize went to local girl Pippa Middleclass an...
You've heard of the piece of burnt toast that looks like Jesus, the tea leaves that look like Elvis, and used tampon that looks like the Mother Theresa. Now there is a new addition to the list of everyday objects that look like famous people - a slap...
Norwich 1-6 Man City Norfolk. Home of turkey farms, incest and Norwich City Football Club. It is a widely reported statistical fact that the number of food based puns increases whenever Norwich, also known as the Canaries, are on the receiving...
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