In a disturbing start to an idyllic Sunday Morning, a vicars wife in Chilenden, Kent, was startled by a drone in her garden.
Mrs Fortunata Renwhite described the drone as small, "whiny" and black with three legs like that bloke from number seven.
A vicar who believes shoes and socks are "the tools of the Devil" has been turned away from a pub in Todmorden, West Yorkshire, for being barefooted.
Martin Chuzzlewit, 56, landlord of the Splintered Potsherd on Boundary Street, asked the Reverend...
"The village sign "Welcome to Upper Dicker" has been stolen over 50 times," said the local Vicar, Mike Hunt.
"I think we've had enough!" Mike told our countryside correspondent. Now by a special act of Parliament its name has been changed to Bell...
Reverend Dicker stood in the pulpit and looked out onto his congregation. He had done this every Sunday for thirty years. Today would be his last sermon before retiring to the sunny isle of Capri.
The church was full, as usual, with the usual people. Gods flock all bleating to the same tune.
While waiting for the hymn to finish, Dicker took another swig from his hip flask.
"Good morning bro...
Sorry, you can't go back any further!
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