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President Forgets To Pardon 51,649,998 Turkeys

Funny story: President Forgets To Pardon 51,649,998 Turkeys

WASHINGTON, Nov. 22 -- In a joke-filled pre-Thanksgiving ceremony at the White House yesterday afternoon, President Trump continued a much-beloved American tradition and forgot to pardon approximately 51,649,998 turkeys. While USA Today estimates...

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"Mmm, Tofurky!" Pleads Desperate Turkey in Final Week Before Thanksgiving

Funny story: "Mmm, Tofurky!" Pleads Desperate Turkey in Final Week Before Thanksgiving

Clearly feeling the heat as he approached his looming slaughter at the age of six weeks, a bloated five-week-old teenage turkey desperately attempted to talk up the appeal of "mock meats" like the widely popular soy-based Tofurky. "Mmmm, Tofurky!"...

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President Forgets To Pardon 45,999,998 Turkeys

Funny story: President Forgets To Pardon 45,999,998 Turkeys

WASHINGTON, Nov. 24 -- In a joke-filled pre-Thanksgiving ceremony at the White House yesterday afternoon, President Obama continued a much-beloved American tradition and forgot to pardon approximately 45,999,998 turkeys. Tater and Tot, two turkeys...

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OMG, someone's put a slug in Courtney Stodden's lettuce bikini

Funny story: OMG, someone's put a slug in Courtney Stodden's lettuce bikini

Washington DC - Something slimy has creeped its way out of Courtney Stodden's Butterhead lettuce bikini during a vegan beauty parade. And nibbled a hole in the Iceberg leaves that barely cover the TV star's 44DD bikini cups. TV cameramen filmi...

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Obese Americans - and Some Cops - Cease Eating Pigs

Funny story: Obese Americans - and Some Cops - Cease Eating Pigs

With one-third of Americans obese and a full two-thirds overweight, at least some Americans are re-thinking their pigging out. "I work hard every day to bring home the bacon for my family," explains downtown New Yorker Lance Angelo, who, at a mode...

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Man eats leather thong

A 50-year-old man was admitted to hospital after eating a leather thong in a vain attempt to cure stomach ache. Vegetarian Albert Tewsum, from Gateshead, had been suffering with severe tummy trouble for several days, after unknowingly eating some...

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Vegetarians call for a Bacon Ban

Funny story: Vegetarians call for a Bacon Ban

Vegetarians based in Altrincham, Cheshire, have asked for a complete ban on bacon following the alarming news that more vegetarians have fallen off the wagon due to thinly sliced meat than for any other reason. "It's the smell of cooking bacon," s...

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Bill Clinton Promotes Hitler-Style Vegetarianism at World Rodeo Convention

Funny story: Bill Clinton Promotes Hitler-Style Vegetarianism at World Rodeo Convention

Many rodeo-goers expressed surprise, even shock, at the announcement that former United States president Bill Clinton would be the keynote speaker at the 2012 World Rodeo Convention in Houston, Texas. For one, media sources have in recent years repor...

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Sausage Company Study Shows NO Negative Health Consequences for Vegans Who Double or Even Triple Sausage Intake

Funny story: Sausage Company Study Shows NO Negative Health Consequences for Vegans Who Double or Even Triple Sausage Intake

Modern-day medical research demonstrates a clear and consistent link between meat consumption and virtually all Western diseases - cancer, heart disease and diabetes, to name just a few. Could sausage possibly be an exception? Sausage company H...

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Name Calling Trump

One thing about Trump, no one will ever call him simpatico!
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