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Funny satire stories about sickness

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Funny story: Covid-free Cabinet hit by Measles and other Ills

Covid-free Cabinet hit by Measles and other Ills

With God and the world watching out for the coronavirus, the British cabinet has been hit by a glut of bugs and disorders it could well do without. Health Secretary, Matt Hancock, has gone down with German Measles. "I wasn't expecting this," he cr…

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Funny story: Man Has A Tickly Cough He's A Bit Worried About

Man Has A Tickly Cough He's A Bit Worried About

With the Coronavirus in our midsts, it's understandable that people are just a little bit nervous when they get a regular cough or a cold, and that's exactly what has been the case with one man this week when he had all the symptoms of typical season…

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Funny story: Social-media user sues Facebook because his fingers turned stiff!

Social-media user sues Facebook because his fingers turned stiff!

(NOT EDITED) "Those who perpetrate social-media crimes, should be taken to justice!" Was the reaction of a Facebook user after visiting a physiotherapist who analyzed the man's fingers, which were totally 'stiff!' After being diagnosed with a drea…

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Funny story: Introverts Everywhere Secretly Rejoice at Coronavirus Excuse to Isolate

Introverts Everywhere Secretly Rejoice at Coronavirus Excuse to Isolate

“Just to be on the safe side, I’m self-quarantining,’ Calvin Jessup of Nashville, Tennessee, told the therapist who’s been treating him for anxiety and depression. “I know you’ve told me how crucial it is to develop community, but I couldn’t live wit...

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Funny story: Nashville Man Successfully Treats Coronavirus with Wedge of Lime

Nashville Man Successfully Treats Coronavirus with Wedge of Lime

Feeling parched and a little feverish, Justin Lancet of Nashville, Tennessee, successfully treated his suspected case of coronavirus with a chilled beverage accompanied by a wedge of lime. “It really took the edge off,” said Lancet, who takes conc...

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Funny story: Man Can't Seem To Get Rid Of Phlegm From His Chest

Man Can't Seem To Get Rid Of Phlegm From His Chest

A man who has been suffering from some kind of virulent Asian 'flu for more than three weeks now, has admitted that, despite taking various medicines to lower the fever, provide pain relief, and to loosen the breathing-restrictive matter on his lungs...

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Funny story: Raw Food Vegan Admits to Having a Cold

Raw Food Vegan Admits to Having a Cold

"I feel like such a failure," said a hoarse Jeff Hayes of Cambridge, Massachusetts, a raw food vegan who finally came clean that he had come down with a cold. "I've let down the entire raw community. Not to mention broccoli sprouts." When it was...

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Funny story: Airplane passengers sickened by exposure to Vanilla Ice

Airplane passengers sickened by exposure to Vanilla Ice

Doctors have concluded that the mystery illness that sickened a large number of passengers traveling from Dubai to New York was Vanilla Ice Exposure. Although, Robert Michael Van Winkle the performer that goes by the name Vanilla Ice was purported t...

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Funny story: Cruise Ships Like Hospital According to Passengers

Cruise Ships Like Hospital According to Passengers

According to Mr & Mrs Franklin Getz, a trip on a criese ship is like going into a hospital. Odd are pretty good that you will come down with something that you didn't go for. "Like a hospital, if one person is sick and it can be caught by othe...

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Funny story: Retching is catching

Retching is catching

Watching someone retch can induce feelings of sickness in the watchers. Retching is more contagious than yawning and laughter - except when these latter two reactions are undertaken simultaneously whilst eating a biscuit. In which case, retching...

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Funny story: Worries over Samantha Cameron - the woman behind our Nepotistic... I mean National Coalition Government!

Worries over Samantha Cameron - the woman behind our Nepotistic... I mean National Coalition Government!

David Cameron is a direct descendant of King William IV and his mistress Dorothea Jordan. This illegitimate line consists of five generations of women on his father's maternal side starting with Elizabeth Hay, Countess of Erroll née FitzClarence,...

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Funny story: Britain Rejoices - It's 'Pull A Sickie' Day

Britain Rejoices - It's 'Pull A Sickie' Day

It's been attributed to post Christmas blues, bad weather, the very thought of working for months until the summer hols, the recession and lack of sunlight, but whatever the reason, what is not in dispute is that today, the 1st of February is the mos...

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Funny story: Bradford Factory Scuppered

Bradford Factory Scuppered

A Bradford factory, which once used a convoluted method of calculating employee absence from the workplace has finally been scuppered by plucky employee Arturo Scargillo, a trades union member who decided to take them on at their own game when threat...

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Funny story: Does watching the news on TV make you sick?

Does watching the news on TV make you sick?

Results of research into the nausea many people feel when watching the news, has been published today. "When the audience feels uneasiness or nervousness while watching news broadcasts, especially of horrorific plane crashes and nails across the b...

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Funny story: National Sickie Day: A Success

National Sickie Day: A Success

After the failure of National Sausage Day, and National Toilet Paper Day, the Department of Stupidly Named Days did not hold out much hope for the latest initiative: National Sickie Day. The first Monday in February has been dubbed National Sickie...

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Funny story: Band's music designed to cause illness?

Band's music designed to cause illness?

The rock band Probe has become the focus of accusations from the medical community who say their music is causing listeners to feel sick.

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Funny story: Big Brother is Terminal. Will Someone Donate a Heart?

Big Brother is Terminal. Will Someone Donate a Heart?

A new show from the makers of Big Brother, that will see a terminally ill person choose which of three people in need of a transplant gets a kidney, will probably, tragically, still attract viewers.

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