In a made for the movies story, a little boy presumed lost at sea was rescued and deposited on a Monterey beach by a great white shark. Two year old Dahl Kirsch and twelve others were swept off the Presidio Ferry near Oakland, CA, when it was hit...
A hedgehog widely reported to have been saved after being stuck in a crisp packet in Weston Super Mare has hit back at his rescuers, saying he had never asked for help. The hedgehog, given the name Crispin by the team that extracted him from a rai...
Orgiva, Espana: Brit and Dutch holidaymakers basking in the Andalucian sun and diving into their swimming pool were shaken last night as they had to suddenly put their life-saving skills into action. After their delicious, romantic meal the Brit t...
In an incident that can only come from the twisted minds of Matt Groening or South Park creators Trey Parker and Matt Stone, NYPD and NY fire departments arrived at the New York Apartment of Joy Behar to find her on the floor with a life-size mannequ...
The Queen narrowly escaped death this afternoon when falling overboard from the Thames cruiser Spirit of Chartwell during today's Royal Jubilee river pageant. The incident occurred as the boat, converted into a barge for the day, went underneath...
Craven helicopter service made a dramatic rescue of a long-haired fell-runner on Wild Boar Fell this weekend. 65-year-old Bob Dylan was nearing the top of the Fell and was within a hair's breadth of beating his personal best time of 29 minutes.
Italian authorities have discovered the last two survivors from the ill-fated cruise ship, Cazzo D'Oro, that crashed into a sandbar off the Venetian coast two weeks ago. The world had been eagerly awaiting news on the fate of the last two unaccounte...
The Surrey coastguard were called to the Tesbury's Supermarket in Dorking yesterday to rescue Ashley Darr, a local resident, trapped in the vegetable isle. "It was terrible," said Celia North, manager of the store. "There were hundreds of people j...
A team of rescuers had a succession of surprises during a series of exercises in a range of mountains in North Wales last weekend. Behind a heap of stones they found a heavily loquacious man half-buried under a massive pile of pages. The man had b...
A plane chartered by the Canadian government to fly stranded citizens out of Libya has left Tripoli airport completely empty, Canadian sources have reported. Although this may appear a bit bizarre, a number of other countries have had similar expe...
Proving once again that parents believe Chuck E. Cheese is a place to bring your children and forget about them, a 2-year-old Pennsylvania girl managed to climb in to a crane game at the eatery, and could not climb back out. I Know You're Reading Th...
In a world exclusive, In Seine News can reveal the whereabouts of the world's most (un)wanted criminal Osama bin Laden. The former terrorist/CIA agent (now retired), has remained elusive for the past decade even though a $20 million bounty has been o...
Nine boys ranging in age from fourteen to seventeen years old were arrested yesterday at a local watering hole in Calama, Chile, after posing as rescued workers from the nearby Atacama Desert copper mine disaster. Dressed in dirty coveralls, nearl...
Through an interpreter (the Dog Whisperer), Lassie has informed local police the she has no plans to tell them which well Timmy is in. The famous collie, who has saved the boy from caves, fires, storms, lions, wolves, bears, snakes, wells, collapsin...
Failing in her attempt to sail around the world, sixteen year old Abby Sunderland was rescued by a ready, willing and able group of young Somali Pirates who had managed to sail several thousand miles out of their own jurisdiction just for the privile...
Rome, Italy. In mind-blowingly staggering news, a person has been freed from the lava covered ruins of Pompeii, after the volcanic eruption of nearby Mt Vesuvius in AD 79. The gentleman, still breathing and conscious, was half smiling and praisin...
As the UK shivers in -18C temperatures, Minister For Crap Weather, Stormy Galesleet announced that the government were preparing to take the last resort measure of flying in famous American troubleshooter, Frankie the J from his home in West 'By God'...
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