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Funny satire stories about nuts

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Funny story: Doctors reveal Theresa May's head is full of nuts

Doctors reveal Theresa May's head is full of nuts

A routine prime ministerial brain scan has shown a large quantity of nuts piled inside Theresa May's brain cavity. A doctor described the results as surprising, and said, "Normally, we would expect to find the brain there." The nuts are mostly aco...

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Funny story: Joey Walnuts eats 72 Rockey Mountain Oysters to win Nathan's Famous title

Joey Walnuts eats 72 Rockey Mountain Oysters to win Nathan's Famous title

Joey Walnuts continues to astonishing the world of competitive eating with his title as Rockey Mountain Oyster King. On Tuesday, the 21-year-old genius won the Nathan's Rockey Mountain Oysters Contest for the 10th time, breaking his own record by...

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Funny story: Nut-Free Mile High Airways in anaphylactic shock at flight attendant's brazilian

Nut-Free Mile High Airways in anaphylactic shock at flight attendant's brazilian

New York - An airline catering to the lucrative Asian eunuch market is being sued by one of its hand-picked staff. Nut-Free Mile High Airways accidentally posted nude pics of 2014 Flight Attendant of the Year winner Willy Hazel on its holiday boo...

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Funny story: Van Gogh On Viagra? Secret Ingredient Passed Around.

Van Gogh On Viagra? Secret Ingredient Passed Around.

Artist Vincent Van Gogh is well known post-impressionist whose works bring millions of dollars in any auction. But why did he change his paintings later in his life? "He went from bright Sunflowers to Blue self-portraits", stated one art critic. H...

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Funny story: You Can't Satirize This

You Can't Satirize This

TEHRAN - Richard Nelson Frye, a renowned American scholar of Iran who died last month in Boston at 94, wanted to be buried at a spot in this country where songbirds sing and dry desert breezes cool the slow afternoons. Mr. Frye, a Harvard professo...

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Funny story: Nutty Theory Confirmed by Scientific Study!

Nutty Theory Confirmed by Scientific Study!

Ready-peeled nut companies will have to include the shells of the nuts in their bags from September this year following a ruling by the EU in Brussels. It comes as part of the EU's concerted efforts to see a significant reduction in the numbers of ob...

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Funny story: Sucking "nuts" is healthy declare scientists!

Sucking "nuts" is healthy declare scientists!

It seems that people who suck "nuts", hetero and gay are expected to live longer than non-suckers. Scientists have been testing guinea pigs and discovered that the one's who suck small amounts every day are in less risk of getting cancer, heart di...

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Funny story: Toronto Cop Pleads Guilty After Threatening to Taser Suspect's Nuts

Toronto Cop Pleads Guilty After Threatening to Taser Suspect's Nuts

A Toronto police officer is expected to be sentence to daily rape and beatings, after pleading guilty to Threatening Bodily Harm after telling a handcuffed suspect that he would taser him in an uncomfortable place. They're not... ...all gems, everyo...

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Funny story: Blind Squirrel Finds Nut In White House

Blind Squirrel Finds Nut In White House

White House Press Secretary, Sarah Huckabee Sanders, confirmed today that a blind squirrel named "Morris" had "surreptitiously entered the White House this past week, and indeed had found a nut in the Oval Office." Denying the report published in...

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Funny story: United Fudge Packers Excited About New Hazel Nut Enema

United Fudge Packers Excited About New Hazel Nut Enema

The United Fudge Packer Union, which represents millions of fudge packers in the USA, today issued a declaration of support for a product that might revolutionize the fudge packing industry. At no time in the history of fudge packing has there ever b...

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Funny story: Patagonia Nut Farmer Moonlights as Spoof Writer

Patagonia Nut Farmer Moonlights as Spoof Writer

Not originally recognized in any country other than his own, Philbert Macadamia, Chilean nut grower and the country's largest exporter is also becoming wildly popular as a satirical writer for TheSpoof.com online magazine. Preferring to deftly spo...

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Funny story: OCD "Food Nazi" claims assaulted at local Trader Joe's

OCD "Food Nazi" claims assaulted at local Trader Joe's

A regular customer of the local Trader Joe's, known commonly among staff and fellow customers as "the Food Nazi," claimed to have been assaulted by another customer while shopping at the store on Saturday. "It's an outrage," snapped Holly Sheet, 3...

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Funny story: Great news for being a "Nutter": it lowers cholesterol levels!

Great news for being a "Nutter": it lowers cholesterol levels!

Spoof "Nutters" (readers and writers) have welcomed the news that their "nutty" habits are actually contributing to their health! In fact being a "Nutter" supposedly reduces cholesterol levels in the blood. Spoof expert,and very cracked NUT, Ja...

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Funny story: Truck Nuts Really Are Reproductive Organs

Truck Nuts Really Are Reproductive Organs

Drive around anywhere in Rural America and you will see pick-up trucks with something hanging from the trailer hitch. Called truck nuts, truck testicles, trailer balls, and many other names, these dangling items look like a scrotum containing two 'n...

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Funny story: McCain hires Rev Jesse Jackson as Press Spokesman

McCain hires Rev Jesse Jackson as Press Spokesman

'I like the way he talks, what can I say?' said Senator McCain at a press conference this afternoon. He was announcing the latest addition to his campaign team - Reverend Jesse Jackson.

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Funny story: Hoon Furious at MOD overspend.

Hoon Furious at MOD overspend.

Defence Minister Geoff Hoon was reportedly furious last night at the news of an MOD overspend. According to an MOD spokesman "Geoff went nuts, he was ranting about not being told anything by the department." Its seems the that MOD officials failed t...

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