CHICAGO – (Satire News) – The National Hockey League's Chicago Blackhawks organization is using the attorney-client privilege clause in order to not have to address the alleged 2019 Zamboni Sex Scandal. Sports reporter Zorro La Bamba, with The Spo…
TORONTO - (sports satire) - Due to increased stress, anxiety and high blood pressure rates caused by Game 1 of the Blue Jackets - Lightning series, NHL Commissioner Gary Bettman announced that all future Stanley Cup Playoff games can end in a shootou…
SEATTLE (Funny Sport News) – After several contests, and over 30,000 suggestions, the new National Hockey League expansion team has decided on a nickname. The owners of the NHL team said that it was a very difficult choice but they picked the Krak…
Toronto, CANADA (a country north of the USA) In Canada today, news came that every man, woman and dog within its borders has been nervously waiting for—the long drought is over—hockey will soon begin again! Yes, there is a God! If the good folks…
According to reliable sources within the Blackhawks staff, they are thinking about getting a new logo - not because of the Blackhawk's use of the Native American Head but because of how they are playing this season and how many sponsors are pulling o...
Yellowknife, Canada In an effort to bring professional hockey back to its roots, the NHL, now relocated way up near the North Pole in the Yukon, have announced that teams that are in areas that don't have lakes that freeze or even snow can't have a h...
There was a scary moment in last night's game between the Ottawa Senators and the Montreal Canadiens. Following a PK Subban slash, Ottawa's Mark Stone collapse on the ice, writhing in pain. He promptly left the ice holding his right wrist. "I'm o...
The New York Rangers weren't expected to earn a spot in this year's Stanley Cup Playoffs. But they surprised the experts by making it to the final round. Unfortunately, their opponent, the Los Angeles Kings, is playing up to expectations, and is abo...
Toronto, Ontario - The Stanley Cup is no more. The professional sports world's most iconic championship trophy has been recast into dozens of personal "Support Stanleys" - individual-sized cups designed to shield a player's privates from th...
Cold part, Canada - Starting defenseman Larry McMurphy was suspended 2 games for his repeated violation of NHL dress code. According to section 3.41.2 "No player, in accordance with hockey tradition, shall have a complete set of front teeth." His sus...
HOLLYWOOD - Lions Face Pictures in association with Pipe Dream Films has just announced that Adam Lambert will be starring in Salvo Classacoti's motion picture The Anderson Cooper Story. Lambert spoke with Pomona Vox of Silver Screen Showcase Maga...
We accept the fact that, when your hometown team is knocked out of the playoffs, the season is generally over. This is never truer than for basketball and hockey. By the time the midnight sun rises, you start to hum the old refrain, "Wait till nex...
NEW YORK, NY - NHL Media Advisor Roger 'Stiff' Babcock knows that, in today's media-driven culture, hockey has long taken a backseat to the NFL. And the NBA. And the WNBA. And NASCAR. And the MMA. Even the WB. But now Babcock sees a future...
Rumors circulate that an active gay player will come charging out of his closet in the NFL locker room. He cannot be penalized with a charging call because this is not the NHL. We presume that an active player may be more interesting than a passiv...
The NHL (no hockey league) continues to be a non-story and only borders on humor if you think watching glaciers fall into the ocean is funny. Much debate has centered on the identity of the villain in this story. The two main culprits are Donald F...
Coming fresh off lockouts with the NBA and NFL, fans are enjoying a change as the NHL enters it's second lockout in 9 years. After two years of millionaire NFL and NBA players arguing with billionaire NFL and NBA team owners, fans are being refreshed...
Impacting the S&P, Nikkei and European markets today, news of last night's announcement over the Canadian Beer Industry bailout saw stock futures climb sharply at each market's opening bell. Canadian Senate members approved the bailout after a...
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