LOS ANGELES – (Satire News) - Meghan Markle spoke with TMZ and said that Michael Cohen was gracious enough to send her a copy of his book about Trump titled, “Disloyal – The Truth and Nothing But The Truth.” Meghan said that on page 4, she read ab…
'Mr Trump? President Putin will see you now.' 'Great, great! This is gonna be beautiful, so beautiful! But hey, guys - you checked this place for those little tiny cameras, hidden mikes, Polonium 210, crazy stuff like that?' 'Yessir, Mr President!' 'Fabulous, just fabulous. Told you we could trust Putin didn't I? Didn't I?' 'Yessir, you did, just before TapeGate.' 'Hey, hey Pompeo -...
An investigation into the Miss Universe Beauty Pageant has revealed that contestants are always from planet earth. Years of documents going back to the event's inception have reportedly been uncovered, all of which show a consistent pattern of exclus...
Muppet character and movie star, Miss Piggy Jamon, will soon file a $380M lawsuit against U.S. Presidential candidate, real estate developer and reality television personality, Donald J. Trump. Amiko Aventurista reports that Missy Piggy has three ba...
After hearing former Miss Universe Alicia Machado's story of being bullied, insulted, harassed and intimidated by current presidential candidate Donald Trump while Miss Universe, Ms. Piggy hits the warpath. "Who does he think he is? Just look at h...
Las Vegas NV- "I made a terrible mistake tonight in announcing the wrong winner and runner-up for the Miss Universe pageant. I know how much pride many countries, fans and most importantly, the contestants take in preparing for this night. I hope tha...
THE REIGN IN, SPAIN -- In the wake of her recent Instagram announcement of her engagement to disk jockey Vanessa Cortes, former Miss Spain, Patricia ("Patty-Cakes") Yurena ("The Urinal") Rodriquez ("Rocky"), has created quite a furor among like-minde...
NEW YORK CITY - Season 12 of The Celebrity Apprentice kicked off with 18 celebrities including singers Clay Aiken, Debbie Gibson, Aubrey O'Day, and Dee Snider, who is better known as the lead singer for Twisted Sister. Other celebrities included t...
Buenos Aires - In a twist of fate, or perhaps just twisted in general, the co-joined McBriar twins, Terry and Mary, sung and bounced their way into the hearts of thousands in Buenos Aires and millions around the world in the international Miss Univer...
Guantanamo Bay, Cuba - Miss Universe and Miss USA have taken a firsthand look at the U.S. prison for terrorism suspects and 7-11 gas station owners at Guantanamo Bay. The beauty pageant winners took part in a VIP tour to entertain American militar...
Vietnam - (Bananaskin Mess): Future contestants in the Miss Universe pageant will be offered a state-of-the-art hex detox after Miss USA sponsors complained their luscious lovely's ass-over-tit tumble on the catwalk was the result of an ongoing c...
Caracas Venezuela-- The Miss Universe pageant was held over the weekend in this capital city. Contestants came from all over the world and even from other planets. A contestant from the Triffid Nebula was crowned Miss Universe.
Nha Trang, Vietnam - (Sore Ass Mess): The Curse of Agent Orange was blamed today as comely Texan Crystal Stewart tripped and fell flat on her ass during the Miss Universe pageant in Vietnam today.
Mexico Shitty - (Ass Mess): Humiliated, heckled, jeered and reviled Miss USA Rachel Smith has vowed to sue the GOP 'for being made the fall-guy in their dumbass immigration policies':...
Mexico City - (Ass Mess): The only two blonde beauties to reach this year's Miss Universe Final 15 have hit back at blatant Mexican discrimination favoring brunette contestants:...
Mexico City - (Ass Mess): Newly crowned Miss Universe, 20 year old Miss Japan Riyo Mori, has hit back at allegations that the Sony Corporation rigged the pageant by doshing up the Mexican government with a $250 million bung for their beauty to win th...
Mexico City - (Ass Mess): Beleagured Miss USA Rachel Smith has blamed 'Mexican voodoo' after slipping and falling on the Miss Universe catwalk last night during the evening gown parade.
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