MIAMI – (Satire News) – iRumors is reporting that the mayor and city council of Miami have had it with whores wandering all over downtown and plying their trade in plain site of decent tourists, local citizens, and Haitian immigrants. One MPD offi…
MIAMI – (Satire News) – The United States Hurricane Center has decided to make a change to the traditional manner of naming hurricanes alphabetically using male and female names. USHC Executive Director Frances Honeybush, 29, has stated that in th…
TALLAHASSEE, Florida – (Satire News) – The iRumors News Agency has found out that 2.9 million of the votes cast for Trump in the Plywood State were cast by Cubans, who are living in the United States illegally. The agency stated that most of the i…
Miami, FL - Miami Mayor, Roberto Pinkipants, needed to find a new fireworks display company for their upcoming 4th of July fireworks extravaganza - and they needed it fast! But, of course, the problem is, every company in the business is pretty busy...
Uranus, PA - A woman from Miami who was on her way with her husband to visit their son and his family, who live in Uranus, claims she was permanently traumatized by seeing the butts of two horses who were being pulled in a trailer in front of her. T...
37,500 innocent Russian-Americans, which U.S. authorities this week reportedly tracked down and apprehended, are now living in internment camps in Miami Beach, Florida. It is expected more are set to join them. Packing the detainees on first cl...
MIAMI - The United States Department of Hurricanes has just informed the national news media that they have made a fabulous discovery. A team of oceanic scientists working under the leadership of Dr. Cleopatra Mangosteen [Harvard-1993] have discov...
MIAMI - A Miami couple purchased a parrot three weeks ago and within four days they had taught it to sing the hit song by Queen "We Are The Champions." Barry and Gail Honeyhorn, who have only been married for three months, said that they had no id...
SASKATCHENWAN, Saskatoon - The government of Canada has announced that it has just signed a deal with Cuba to ship 80,000 moose to the island country. Canadian spokesperson Pierre Hors D'oeuvres stated that the moose will be rounded up by furlough...
MIAMI - Pit Bull watched the first game of the NBA Finals and he was thrilled that the San Antonio Spurs defeated the Miami Heat 92-88. After the game Pit Bull was asked by Zorro La Bamba with The Sports Bet Gazette about the rumor that he and Jen...
Miami, FL - Miami's first openly gay Mayor, Ronaldo "Buddy" Diaz, announced on Tuesday that the entire Miami/Dade police force would soon be taking off their clothes. Every officer in the department will be switching from their very traditional black...
MIAMI, Fl. - Cannibals from all over the United States and the world have registered their complaints that the media coverage following an attack in Miami is unfairly depicting cannibalism as an act committed on a living person. A cannibal is defi...
MIAMI - The ownership of the Miami Marlins giving in to fan pressure from the Cuban-American community has issued a five game suspension to manager Ozzie Guillen. Guillen, who spoke on Miami's Channel 123 using subtitles stated that he is very sor...
MIAMI - The manager of Major League Baseball's Miami Marlins, Ozzie Guillen has done gone and to quote Britney Spears "Oops...I Did It Again!" This time the native of Venezuela told some reporters that he really feels that former Cuban dictator Fi...
Miami, FL--Everyone knows that long hair makes for better rock music, but did you know that it makes for a better planet, too? The sold-out crowd at American Airlines Arena in Miami, FL, was stunned last night when the elfin Radiohead frontman, Th...
The Miami Marlins Baseball team unveiled their new uniform and colors on Friday night. Many fans had hoped that the leaked logo and color scheme from September was a hoax. Apparently it was not and many fans are not happy. Long time Marlins fan C...
The days of sitting down after a long day may soon be over. In response to a CNN report claiming that sitting for hours can shave years off lives, a residence-challenged man in Miami is calling for the abolition of chairs. "They're a hateful contr...
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