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Funny satire stories about luck

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Funny story: Nashville Man Wins by Snoozing

Nashville Man Wins by Snoozing

Flouting the common wisdom that if you snooze, you lose, Carl Jansen of Nashville, Tennessee, won a pair of prime concert tickets as the direct result of his hitting the snooze button, which delayed his departure for work and set him up perfectly to...

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Funny story: Bird Shit On Man's Head

Bird Shit On Man's Head

A man taking a relaxing stroll along a public footpath at a local golf course in Hull on Saturday evening, received the shock of his adult life when, from a height of approximately 10 metres, a bird shit on his bonce. The man, Moys Kenwood, was wa...

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Funny story: My Life as a Man #32

My Life as a Man #32

Another opportunity for happiness missed because I am so stupid and clueless With the possible exception of Karl Rove, I must be the stupidest, most clueless man in the United States. Belay that, mates, I am the stupidest, most clueless man on the Planet Earth! Yesterday, being Thanksgiving, I had the day off from work, and after feasting on more calories than the average Sudanese child con...

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Funny story: World's Unluckiest Man Killed By Falling Satellite

World's Unluckiest Man Killed By Falling Satellite

Ned Tremble, the world's unluckiest man, was sadly killed yesterday by a falling satellite, in what appeared to be the final insult to a life of hardship. Tremble achieved official 'unluckiest' status four years ago, after a string of mishaps, unf...

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Funny story: Britain's largest treasure hoard found in a back garden in Wigan

Britain's largest treasure hoard found in a back garden in Wigan

Two amateur treasure hunters in Wigan were tying out a new metal detector in their own back garden when they uncovered a rare haul of Roman gold and silver. "We were staggered when it beeped over my petunias," said Kathy Trove. "Staggered, yeah...

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Funny story: Paul Konchesky voted luckiest bloke alive

Paul Konchesky voted luckiest bloke alive

Liverpool left back Paul Konchesky has been voted the luckiest bloke alive. Konchesky 29, who followed boss Roy Hodgson from Fulham to Liverpool in the summer, is said to have agreed with the outcome of vote. He excitedly told reporters, "This is...

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