A man who woke up one morning last week with a nasty rash on his stomach, his upper arms and upper legs - but not his testicles - has finally decided to do something about it, after four days of constant itching and scratching himself into a frenzy.
Railing against the dearth of testing for coronavirus, the Food and Drug Administration emphasized the importance of making testing widely available, so that treatment of Americans demonstrating cold-like or flu-like symptoms can proceed exactly as i...
Amidst a flurry of concerns about a new and deadly virus spreading from China, Patrick Cramer, a writer living in New York City, was stricken with a debilitating case of the ideas. "It wasn't quite as bad as Ebola," said Cramer, who is still recup...
A man who has been suffering from some kind of virulent Asian 'flu for more than three weeks now, has admitted that, despite taking various medicines to lower the fever, provide pain relief, and to loosen the breathing-restrictive matter on his lungs...
Gioni Malocutia suffers from Tourette's syndrome, an illness often skewered by comedians, but one that makes it difficult if not impossible to find a mate or even an occasional date in real life. After having zero success on traditional dating sit...
Donald Trump's challenge to Russian hackers to find the dirt on Hillary Clinton has backfired as Wikileaks released hacked medical records damaging to both Clinton and Trump. The revelations that neither candidate is physically fit to run a lemona...
Los Angeles, CA - Humans, much like gorillas: are interested, influenced, and educated by viewing recordings of their own species copulating on monitors. Humans love pornography and it influences the sex practices they engage in. Unless the last porn...
The new DSM V categorization of psychiatric disorders published by the American Psychiatric Association as a new description of separation anxiety and a new category of fetishes. In the DSM IV these disorders related only to people. But now they h...
Susan Boyle has never been able to copulate with a man and after visiting the doctor she was told why. She was diagnosed with Asperger's syndrome which prevents her from becoming sexually aggressive with men. The diseases is a mild form of autism...
When children are young, many a parent will attempt to have a so-called Chicken Pox Party. This is an attempt to deliberately infect their child with this mild, but virulent disease early on, so that they do not scar. With the advances in modern m...
Bartholomew Utterswaithe, our 65 year old Nottingham correspondent and unemployed Gas Street lamp wick trimmer, found himself housebound the other day. Partly due to his arthritis, losing his free-bus-pass, the flapping holed sole of of his right shoe, and the lousy wet weather. He was straining a thrice-used Asda tea bag, and thought about what he might be missing on his cancelled wonderful...
Christmas may be a time of mistletoe and wine, but it is also a time of coughs and sniffles, and it seems that the long winter months are being blamed for a sharp rise in cases of combined Yuppie/Man Flu (or YuMF for short). Practitioners describe th...
With the news of hurricanes quickly whisking themselves away, the media turns to cold and flu season for its latest outbreak of media frenzy. This affliction which affects mainly reporters and those who run news agencies occurs any time a story i...
People are eating a healthier diet these days and have reduced the use of red meats. However, it also means increasing the use of lean meats such as fish, chicken and turkey. Since the popularity of switching hamburg meat to ground turkey, more and...
Libuse, La. - Mrs. Del Taylor remembers last Friday morning when, she says with a bit of nervous laughter, she discovered only four eggs and a small packet of grated American cheese in the refrigerator. Her husband Kenny was in the bathroom readying...
Unbelievably popular television journalist, Jeremy Clarkson, has - according to chiropody reports - got a verruca. The chiropody reports, liberated from a Chipping Norton waste paper bin and painstakingly glued back together from their shredded re...
Appearing before the General Medical Council, Doctor Amor DeFreitas, who works as a GP in downtown Doncaster was accused of only ever prescribing valium to patients, regardless of their medical condition. The matter first came to light when a loca...
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